Adam4Adam blog readers who are on the down low, what does it really feel like living “on the DL”?
The term “men on the down low” (often abbreviated as “DL”) refers to men who are typically in heterosexual relationships or identify as heterosexual but also engage in sexual encounters or relationships with other men in secret. Reportedly, this concept gained attention within the context of the African American and Latino communities, where there can be significant stigma and discrimination associated with homosexuality.
It’s essential to recognize that the term “on the down low” has been criticized for reinforcing stereotypes and oversimplifying complex sexual behaviors and identities. Men who engage in secret same-sex relationships may do so for various reasons, including societal pressures, fear of discrimination, or a lack of acceptance within their communities or families. Let us all approach discussions about sexuality and identity with sensitivity and without perpetuating stereotypes.
Anyway, we are bringing this up because of stories we read online about how heartbreaking it is for men to live on the DL. Stories like this one. As to why some gay men live on the down low, one netizen posited, “I think more men would be openly bisexual (dating and hooking up with both men and women) if there were no social/religious stigma. That’s what keeps these guys closeted/DL much of the time.”
Do you agree with that comment, guys?
Having said all that, would you say there are a lot of men who are on the down low/DL or are closeted bisexuals? Moreover, would you have sex with married/discreet men?
The opinion on this issue varies. One gay man said he won’t have sex with married men, “I won’t knowingly engage in a situation wherein there would be someone who would be VERY upset to know I exist.” Meanwhile, another man shared, “I’m married, in an open relationship and regularly hookup with married/DL guys. I stay out of their business and they stay out of mine.” He added, “End of story.”
What about you guys, what are your thoughts on this one? Share with us your opinions and stories in the comments section below.