Would you say that you are on the kinky side or are you guys vanilla when it comes to sex? And what if your partner wants a different thing in bed than you do, would that be an issue for you?
If you are the vanilla type, would you try and experiment, get out of your comfort zone, and experience new things in bed all in the name of love? Or if you are the kinky type, would you try and “settle” for vanilla because you can see that your partner feels uncomfortable and awkward when going along with you and when acting out your sexual roleplays?
What does vanilla sex and kinky sex mean to you, anyway? One Redditor said he prefers kinky all the way because he “can’t get hard if there are no gags involved.” Another one said pretty much the same: that he is a kinky person because for him, “vanilla seems a bit boring,” a sentiment that seems to be wildly popular among the respondents in the thread. On the other hand, others say that while they prefer kinky, they “make sure there is some vanilla in-between.” And of course there are also others who are fans of both—they said “kinky or vanilla, ice-cream either way.” And here is my favorite answer out of them all because I thought it was witty: “As the saying goes, sex is like pizza. It’s good no matter what. Unless it’s kinky pizza…which is friggin amazing.”
But what about you, guys? What do you prefer, kinky sex or vanilla? And what if your preference is not compatible with that of your partner’s, would you stop dating them? What if you feel awkward doing the kinks that your partner prefers, or maybe you even find them distasteful or you feel turned off by them or vice versa? What would you do? Share with us your thoughts and stories in the comments section below.
Ok, so, like we now have to use racial terms like VANILLA, to describe a person’s freak side?
BULLSHYT!
I never thought of vanilla as a racial term, but I assume your referring that white guys are vanilla and black guys are “chocolate”? Interesting! Oh yea, chocolate milk comes from chocolate cows, right?
Let’s not be silly. Vanilla = plain. Nothing racist.
For many many years now, vanilla has referred to kink to mean bland, ordinary, plain sex. It in no way has anything to do with race.
What makes it racial? That is bs. Typical of what the country is coming to. So many people crying foul when they dont even know the meaning of what the are crying foul about
I guess kinky is in great eye of the beholder. I had a regular top that would give me an enema before sex or watch while I did myself. Not interested in scat though. I guess it was the humiliation of submitting to to this that got me hot.
I also liked taking a full bladder strait from the tap.
Another kink was roleplay rape.
That’s about all I’ve done.
I am pretty vanilla, but have tried a little kink. It really depends on what the other guy wants. What some people describe as kink doesn’t really seem kinky at all. Scat and blood is an absolute hell no. As far as kink, I have had my ass filled with a guys full bladder of piss, and I have done that to a guy that I topped. I was with a guy once that wanted me to fist him. I did do it, took a while to get to that point, and once done, he tightened right back up and… Read more »
Much of what you’ve said qualifies as “kink”. Hell, tweaking your nipples is kink in some way… Making a guy wait to cum is kink (called edging)…. So much of what is kink is done by so many guys that Vanilla now is just plain old missionary or doggie style sex…
It is not a deal breaker, but a little kink can spice of sex together and make it just a little more erotic. I like erotic tickling and edging in bondage as both dom and sub. It’s nice to have a guy submit his naked self to you for your play and enjoyment and I also like being tied up and my body played with in erotic stimulation through hands, mouth, and use of toys on you.
I took an assessment on the bdsm (dotcom) website to gauge my kink level. Although not far off, my results included a fat ZERO percent vanilla. I do enjoy vanilla a touch more I believe, 2% maybe. The rest of the results (including 100% slave and 98% submissive) was rather spot on
Considering that I like to kiss/grind, suck, and fuck, I suppose I’m more the in-between type – perhaps leaning more toward vanilla. And since for me, a bi-married, my gay side is all about the sex, I wouldn’t get in bed with anyone who’s into gags, fisting, watersports, or wearing that creepy mask (shown above) anyway. On the other hand, if someone just wants to exchange hand jobs, I’d tell him to look elsewhere too since I really don’t need another dude’s hand to jerk myself off with. That said, I do like rimming – is that considered kink?
No kink for me. Sad that it’s almost a prerequisite in gay sex. That’s why I mostly enjoy solo activity. Suddenly, everyone is a “pig”, yet the word slut shaming exists. On the contrary…
VANILLA-ALL-THE-WAY!
GIVE ME A GOOD, OLD-FASHION 69 TO COMPLETION; THROW IN A NICE, THOROUGH RIM JOB, TOO!
Why burden yourself with versatility, when you can practice to perfection one thing and one thing only.
Genuflection in front of a man’s anatomy is heavenly and you can dispense with grace.
Ah, the joys of simplicity…nothing more needed than a good set of lips, lungs and a pit bull’s jaws!
ah-ah-ah… No-no-no… Rim job = kink.
Nice attempt to equivocate. If you push hard enough, you’ll prove that kissing is kink.
LMC:
For an Oral Boy. giving a thorough Rim Job is the a logical, next step.
Kinky all the way… love being in bondage… captive slave gets me so turned on!
I met an older man about 20 years ago; I was 40 and he introduced me to bdsm and all the SERIOUS FUN you can have with leather. He put me in his sling, tied me to his pillory, had me experience ball stretching, back whipping (no marks). It was awesome. So, I tend to kinky tho find I’m with men who are only vanilla. Also, I’m married and only play safely and discretely on the side.
Non-kinky for me. Some people are into some WEIRD things, whether urine, excrement, fisting, massive dildos, CBT, S&M, ball busting, electric shocks, etc. No thanks! Not interested and definitely do not enjoy seeing let alone experiencing anything remotely close to that. Just get together, get off and go on about your day without worrying about prolapse, fissures, hernias, burst testicles, bloody semen, hemorrhoids from hell, or having to wear adult diapers by age 30.
Yea, I love some kink, and would love to get deeper into it, but I do have some limitations. But those limitations aren’t the usual ones that most of us think about. So I guess you could say I’m kinky, but love usual sex as well. Sure we all love the sucking, fucking, and getting off. But kinkier things makes it more exciting. It’s about bringing two individuals or a group closer together and being one in the same. First off I’m not into anything that hurts or causes pain to any extreme amount. I’m not into leather, face masks… Read more »
Hepatitis is a thing and scat is a good way to get it along with many other diseases.
Where exactly is the “or” in Kinky or Vanilla? Isn’t this really a question those on the sidelines, those not in the game, would ask?
Done well, guys get together for fun sex. Prior the to that, the smart ones have some (adult!) conversation about what’s on the menu…what “fun”. Done right what’s Vanilla and what’s Kinky is known. And after all what is “mild” for some is “wild” for others.
And granted over time man sex play grows. What was kinky a couple of years ago can grow into vanilla (no but deal) over time.
I think i am.more into kink than kust plain vanilla. I like it all. Any way I can get it
I prefer bam-bam domination of a bottom.
More fetish here – love nylon over-the-calf dress socks. I wear them during sex and want my lover to wear them. Hairy bush another turn-on, no shaved pubes. I guess a little kink – love a hairy man wearing lingerie – slip, panties, etc. – not full drag.
kink…tie me up and use me. the kinkier the better
Good one!!! I think I am basically vanilla. I like the pizza reference because everytime I seem to have sex it is always good. I like basic sex usually but can get a little freaky if I’m with the one I want to be with. I enjoy sucking dick and eating ass but it has to be with someone I’m really into. It has to be that special someone for me to go outside my box. Certain things I refuse to do with anyone such as water sports, fisting, toys, no spit whatsoever!!!!, swallowing cum, and lastly no shit whatsoever.… Read more »
Nothing between “Kinky” or “vanilla”?
Kink over vanilla
I prefer kink over vanilla
Pretty vanilla. No one is going to tie me up. Prolonged inactivity just makes me cranky. That being said; if ya gotta piss, please don’t waste it in the toilet.
Gotta say, I’m on the freaky-side my one particular fetish, so, yeah, kinky.
Vanilla ok but kinky so much more fun and intense. Always
I prefer some kink when it comes to sex. I love getting rag dolled.
My first boyfriend was almost as vanilla as they come. Though he enjoys rimming, I do not. Throughout our relationship, I tried to open him to the idea that he had a kinky boyfriend that wanted to do other things than fucking and sucking. I even took him to a leather contest, which he really didn’t “get”. After a while, I came to accept that this was just his way, his level of interest, and I was okay with that. The sex was still good. We split up for other reasons. Although sex is important in a relationship, it is… Read more »
I refer to what I like as kinky, like bondage, humiliation, watersports, shaving, outdoor, public, puppy play, chastity, anal play, groups, and willing to try just about anything. If a guy is vanilla it will only be a one time thing. Before I get into sex with a guy I am very up front with of what I like and explain that I am a submissive total bottom and I am into kinky wild play. After explaining to some guys what I am into they bail and I perfer they bail instead of waisting my time and energy.
Definitely looking for kinky guys that like bondage. Hard to find someone to trust at first, but vanilla doesn’t even get me excited. And you can always do the vanilla thing after they are tied up. Actually about 75% dominant and 25% submissive here and I like it because the dom is the one in control of what you do and what happens. Oral sex alone just does not cut it, I have never cum as the result of a blowjob. Bottoming doesn’t do it either and my 5″ dick is too small to top. But tie me up and… Read more »
You’re either trolling or confirmation of the mental shortcomings typical of people who get into such crap. Ask yourself why on earth it’s hard for you to cum from a blowjob. Newsflash, that’s not right and indicates you should see a doc, not get “creative”! You people are like the illicit drug users of the sex world. Stop “self-medicating and get informed. It’s obvious you’re confused about the body and stimulation if you don’t think 5 inches is enough to top. The actual beta men are those you find among many gays, sadly. Inside they are insecure and cling desperately… Read more »
I don’t even get hard from a blowjob I think they’re boring and they don’t feel all that great. I prefer body contact as well though I’m not a bottom.
I would love to know the stats of the kink vs vanilla communities. From my limited research, it really seems that kinksters tend to be more likely to be HIV positive, for one. And go figure, there are consequences to an “anything goes” motto. You open yourself up to the universe, you eventually catch the eye of the devil himself. That’s even more reason for me to avoid this creepy scene. Boundaries and a strong ego are great protection against the pitfalls of such a lifestyle. And the reason I say this is because it really appears as though kinky… Read more »
I would agree most of the kink people I’ve encountered are way more sexually motivated than vanilla people and are often more likely to engage in risky sexual practices that will result in disease or permanent injury.
100% Vanilla 🙂
It’s hard to find a really dominant Gay Man , Trust Me , I’m tryin to get My cherry popped , but they cum all over before I get the lube on Him .Which would be fine , if they recharged , and finished the job later > I Love being submissive , it gets me – off ! , Even a little rough Is great . I would definitely choose being like a submissive with a heavy handed Top , but not for any more than to enhance orgasm than abuse . I’d like to be a little abused… Read more »
The Blended Variety, i love seeing my partner both pleased and surprised
[…] Naturally, our readers’ answers to the question above vary. Some of you said they are in the middle, that they enjoy a bit of both, while others are into kinks like bondage. Others are into a range of fetishes but there are also some of our readers who are vanilla all the way. Read their answers here. […]
I’d love to try kinky, but I don’t know wat all the kinks are. Very much love to be tied on the bed, rm dark and someone comes I and crawls on top of me and has their way. If that’s kinky I like it.
Love enemas from a top as well, but not into scat.
Would love to be the bottom in a group. Is that kinky.
Love sex in the outdoors in a private area.
Maybe more, don’t know until I hear it.