Dating: Is Body Odor a Deal Breaker for You?

So, you’re meeting someone for the first time at a restaurant. Someone you have been chatting with on Adam4Adam for quite a while now and you think the two of you have a connection that’s why you hope this meeting is just the first of many more to come. 

You saw him enter the door, his face lights up in recognition and he flashes you a bedimpled smile that makes your heart stutter. He waves at you and he makes his way toward you. You stand up in greeting once he reaches your table and he offers you his hand but then you get a whiff of something noxious as you shake his hand. The unpleasant smell was so strong it made you recoil from his touch inwardly. 

Body odor aside, you enjoyed his company and the feeling is mutual, seeing as he’s asking you for a second date but what do you do now? Would you accept his invitation or would you turn him down? Or would you tell him about his body odor and give the new relationship a shot? 

We are asking because we saw Pablo’s tweet on Twitter where he calls on men to brush their teeth, wash their ass and armpits, etc. when they shower. Watch the short clip below as Pablo tells his followers that the “scent of a man” is different from the “stench of a man.” 

Anyway, exactly how important is the smell of a potential partner or hookup to you? Suppose they don’t have stinky armpits or funky ass smell, would you still reject the guy because you don’t like their scent? Conversely, would you date someone because you think they smell amazing?

It is interesting to note that studies revealed how we are equipped with a human nose that can “sniff out suitable sexual partners.” According to this study, participants were “asked to sniff each bottled body odour and evaluate its pleasantness according to a set of criteria.” Its results revealed that “Gay men showed a strong preference for the body odour of other gay men in the scientific test of how the natural scent of someone’s body can contribute to the choice of a partner.”

To know more about body odors, read here.

There are 68 comments

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  1. hardtopftl

    yes. there are guys that smell like rich, earthy musk (a good smell) and guys who smell like hot spoiled bologna (not a good smell) I quit dating a nice guy because his cologne literally made me sick.

  2. Eddie

    If I were meeting someone for the first time and I got a whiff of B.O., that would sour me a little bit on the guy. But I would probably give him another chance if everything else about the date was going well. If it turned out to be a recurring issue with him I would say something.

    My partner of 3 yrs is a hard working farmer. Sometimes he comes home after a long day of working the fields, dirty and smelly, and he just wants to plop into bed and go to sleep. I have to encourage him to please take a shower first, as I prefer the smell of soap vs. the smell of sweat. Makes for a much better cuddling session.

    • Richard

      Maturity is everything on topics like this. I have an impaired sense of smell. People had to tell me I didn’t smell the greatest and I appreciated their tact.
      If you can’t be diplomatic and honest about something so practical, the road is going to be really hard. And if you can’t address something so basic with someone, then the problem isn’t all theirs.
      We have a problem in this country with things that aren’t issues.

  3. Mars man

    The scent of a man is awesome. But it needs to be a clean, natural smell, not a stink. A shower with out soap is acceptable. Then hit the sack together. Just make sure the ass, crotch, pits are well scrubbed..

  4. Hunter0500

    I like men to smell like men. But there’s a difference between everyday man smell and a lack of understanding of basic hygiene.

    Even a guy who showers well in the morning is going to build up a man smell during the day. For me, colognes or body sprays are not a solution; most of them smell horrible.

    Once just before a first play date, I showered well. As things began to “warm up” and I had begun to crack a sweat, the guy complained that I stank. That was our first … and last … date. Another time, I met with a good bud who had just gotten back from a long bike trek. Although he insisted he should shower first, I “took him as he was” for fun. He had some good unusual smells and tastes. It was fun to just “play dirty”. Of course, we did shower when all was said and done.

    • Dave

      this always makes me laugh ” smell like men ” like if a man is suppose to smell bad, or sweaty. I personally think that it is gross. I’m a man and I smell normal, I never ever smell from the armpits, even after gym because I wash myself twice a day and wear deodorant. This is just basic stuff in 2019. For all humans, men, trans, women and everyone in between.

  5. Ray

    I love the musky smell of a guy…when he showers in the morning, works all day, then wants a meetup.

    Offensive odor, though? Nope.
    And, tbh, those “manly” body washes are a no go…to heavy on the scent for me.

  6. Nathan

    Nathan Writes:

    By definition, an odor is, always, pejorative; whereas, a smell, can be either affirmative, such as a rose, or pejorative, as garbage.

    Some odors are particularly offensive, such as those from the armpits, anal cavity; particularly, from an uncut penis, more commonly referred to as “Fromundercheese.”

    Also, the oral cavity, particularly, the tongue and what’s growing between the teeth. It is the tongue which breeds the majority of odors which smack you-in-the-face.

    An “Hello” from the oral cavity, without proper maintenance, can approximate, an odor from an infected vagina or flatulence stemming from having eaten Bean Soup or having been ridden by a glorious penis that filled the anal cavity with cream…never cleansed from the anal cavity.

    Hence, any instance, or any combination, of the aforementioned, will give cause to Nathan showing you the opposite direction from which you came!

    Nathan’s Mantra: “Cleanliness is next to Godliness,” and Nathan does not like to incur the “Wrath-of-God”!

    • Van

      Nathan – I’ve never read posts as pretentious as yours. Lots of lengthy words, too many misplaced commas and referring to yourself in the third person simply make you sound pretentious and arrogant. Forget body odor – what really stinks on these threads are your insufferable posts. Download a normal personality and stop trying to impress us…..

      • Nathan


        I was neither arrogant nor pompous; I was facetious.

        Anyone who reads any of my retorts would chuckle. This is an A4A Blog and as such, we contributors add,,,accordingly.

        I was, however, facetious and satirical. Next time, you chew someone’s arse for being arrogant and pompous, always remember:

        “A Fox Always Smells His Own Hole.”

        • rparktop

          I have no problem at all with what you said or how you said it. Those are your rights and your choices. I would like to hear you speak in person. It would put a song in my heart to turn and walk away from you in mid-sentence, talking to the air. While you find the way you communicate entertaining, I think it’s just fucking irritating.

        • headsupguy

          Judith Martin does this in her “Miss Manners” newspaper column. I do note that her grammar and punctuation are impeccable. Whereas, Nathan’s are … well … not. It’s also important to note that Martin writes within the context of her own newspaper column; the third-person and conceit are part of the Miss Manners character. It’s kind of charming and funny, because we know Miss Manners is a fictitious character. Without benefit of his own column, Nathan’s third-person grandiosity does come across as supercilious.

          I suggest that A4A utilize Nathan’s talents by inviting him to be a guest poster, augmenting Dave’s unflagging work on this blog. And make sure Nathan has an editor to tweak the grammar/punctuation stuff.

          • Nathan


            Such effeminate fluff!

            If you can recall Miss Manners, than certainly, you can recall your Kinder-garden teacher: Methuselah?

  7. P.A.

    I’m seeing someone now that doesn’t wear deodorant and the guy I dated before him wore tank tops 24/7 and by the end of the day he was ripe, and the new guy sometimes shows up funky. Honestly, it’s not my thing. When I get a whiff of that tang it doesn’t send me into a frenzy it kind of kills the mood to hang out or anything. We live in the south…it’s hot. I agree all that needs to be clean, the difference between funk and pheromones is real.

  8. SitOnMyFace

    Nothing worse than someone who splashes cologne on his private areas. It just isn’t pleasant to smell or taste. Personally I like the all natural smell. Of course a little soap wouldn’t hurt for those with really funky order.

  9. A Gentleman in RSM

    Yes… If I meet someone for the first time get a whiff of something noxious an unpleasant smell was so strong it made you recoil from his touch inwardly and outwardly it is most defiantly a deal breaker. I’ve had the unfortunate pleasure of meeting two different men whose odor was so bad it turn my stomach turn and had to walk away.

    This excludes those chance first meeting where you meet some while you or they have been working out doors or out playing sports i.e. cycling, jogging etc. Where there is no time to freshen up. BUT! if you decide to meet later and they still bring that same odiferousness with them that would be a deal breaker.

    If a person does not have enough self awareness of their own Hygiene and how it affects other whom they maybe in contact with it is a deal breaker, much like those to ware to much cologne or body spray (but that’s an issue for another topic).

    I am an older uncut gentleman for this reason keep myself extremely clean and hygienic and very aware of my body and smells, I am not GQ, Nor do I look like something the cat dragged in or left in the litter box…

    But, like the old saying goes ‘You only get one chance to make a first impression’ and that first impression holds the key to where the day or evening may lead.

    Yes… I is a Deal breaker for me.

  10. Jack

    It really depends on the odor! Some guys musky smell is a turn on to me . But if it really fowl but the situation is as described, cute sexy guy that there is a connection with i would tell him how much i love fucking in the shower ! Get him in there and soaped up fast!!!

  11. Hunter0500

    Men smell. They’re not going to be odor free or “springtime fresh” very long. A reasonable man smell is not a turnoff for me. A guy who was rank with a long term dirty smell would be, but I’ve yet to encounter one.

    On the other hand, A guy with heavy cologne, body spray or heavily fragranted deodorant might be, but if he had several other positive attributes that one attribute would not be a deal killer.

  12. MattK

    Can’t believe I’m writing about a topic like this, but I thought I’d relay a past experience if anyone’s interested: First, to be clear, I’m completely repulsed by B.O. of any sort, especially in bed. That said, there’s one exception I experienced a good 20 years ago: I had intense sex with a very hot dude and the fun started in the shower together. We sudsed ourselves off real good, got dried up, hopped in the sack and got very intense in bed making out, grinding, sucking etc. It got so intense that it got quite sweaty, including under the armpits. I buried my face under one of his pits and it had that typical BO stench, but the fact that it was ‘clean’ and was the result of our intense sex, made it very hot, giving me the kind of chemically-induced-type of jolt one gets from taking a guy’s load orally. Beyond that – BO = yuk in my book.

  13. bjjj

    Some body odor is actually a turn on to me. Love the smell of a man, his cock and ass, sweat, pits, feet, etc. My BF hey he usually smells really good, but just like all of us, sometimes everyone gets hot and sweaty, and yes, has bad breath and farts, etc. No biggie, When you really love and care about someone it’s not that big of a deal.

  14. David

    I make sure I am always clean just before sex, but no deodorant. I ask my partner not to use it as I love pits, hairy pits and a good pube bush. Shaved with those red bumps is a big turn off. Men are hairy and smell like men. If I want to be with a woman then smooth is fine. But I like a man to shower just before coming over no deodorant, tastes shitty. I like to be about to orgasm and the smell of sweat just starting makes me cum harder. Not into raunch, but the natural smell of man who has been working his way to orgasm. I used to suck a young construction worker who came straight from work and his smell was awesome, not raunchy, but the smell of a young man about to orgasm. He moved on after the job and I still miss the smell of his dick and balls and the taste of his cum.

  15. Hunter0500

    Disagree. “Prentensious” is a nasty, hateful atacking insult. Nathan is frank about who he is …and he does it in his own unique (third person way.. I don’t get it but it’s him.). He never attacks others .. as you seemed entitled to do. So what’s up a that?

  16. nick

    Tell the cunt he stink. Tell him go wash his balls or brush his teeth. But if you are meeting someone after work, just realize that both of you won’t smell of the morning flower and let each other know that you both will be a bit rancid. Especially if one of you work as a laborer. All in all, wash, scrub and if you not into cologne or deodorant, at least, at least wear baby powder. It makes a world of difference unless you are into rancid smells. I love the smell of sweaty balls but not the ones that aren’t washed for more than 2 days.

  17. Ben

    My rule is if I don’t want to know what anyone I’m not fucking smells like. In other words if I can smell you three feet from me, it’s off. And if I have to choose between sweat and cologne, give me sweat.

  18. briBri

    Nervous sweat happens, b.o. is different from tangy funk. But bad breath, from an unbrushed rear Tongue, and…tonsil stones… that’s the killer. A whole new generation needs to be educated re Tonsilloliths since routine tonsil removal is no longer the norm.

  19. mike

    A man will put out different odors depending on his type of work or just natural body odor. BO from hard work is pretty harsh yet a mans natural body odor is very sexy and hot. To some it may be the just plain old sink but to others it may be the odor that fuels an erotic evening. Its all a matter of taste.

  20. Derric

    I’m 55, a Navy Vet. Hospital Corpsman and former nurse. I’ve smelled a lot of men especially when stationed with the Marines. While I don’t like regular rank BO, there is a point where manscent can be attractive.

    In my opinion, guys who drink a lot of water, don’t smoke, and steam/sauna regularly tend to have a much cleaner, natural, manscent between regular showers than guys who drink alcohol a lot , smoke, and don’t steam/sauna. CIeaning your pores and hydrating helps.

    I keep a travel pack with floss , deodorant, concentrated mouthwash, Sandalwood oil and cucumber wipes in my car at all times.

    Dallas is hot and humid. Although I sweat I frequently recieve compliments on my scent.

    I’m very oral and love manscents from head to toe but it shouldn’t go beyond a gym scent. If he made me recoil, there wouldn’t be a second date.

  21. Bill

    I am not prejudice at all. I like men of all races. but black me smell different from white men.. It takes a little while to get used to it…but believe me, the reward your about to get from that big hard black dick is well worth it…my first black guy was Ike, he had a 10×7 inch dick…

    • bjjj

      Interesting. My BF is black and I am white, and he doesn’t smell any different than anyone else. Actually he smells quite nice most of the time. Like anyone, black men can have bad breath, sweat, or nasty smell around his dick or ass, but I see no reason skin color would make a difference, Oh yea, not all black men have big cocks, some do, some don’t. My BF just has a normal nice 6 inch cock

    • Freddy

      No sir…. It depends on black guys YOU met. There is NO difference. There are a lot of piggy white, there are a lot of piggy blacks…..Next time take a little time to choose the black guy you want to meet.

  22. headsupguy

    I find fresh sweat kind of sexy. It’s not a preference, but fresh sweat on a guy who regularly observes careful hygiene practices can be attractive. “Old” body odor that results from infrequent bathing and poor laundry care is obnoxious. I met up with a guy from A4A. He was cute, intelligent and funny, but even from a couple feet away, his body odor filled my nose and killed my appetite … for dinner and him. When he expressed interest in extending the evening, I declined, and told him honestly, and as kindly as I could, the reason why. His feelings were hurt, as I knew they would be, and we had no further contact. But I hoped that bringing the problem to his attention might help him in future attempts to find a match.

  23. Paul Smith

    I am sensitive to smells like tobacco and colognes, even clothes detergent and hair shampoos. So I am “scent free”. I can only hope to meet other men who understand the concept. But the real sweat smells that emerge while making love are the best. They say nothing you eat causes an odor so one must be careful about what one wears! So yes, a guy who likes to dramatize their nose (and yours), would need a serious conversation about the on and off of it.

  24. Wes

    I cannot tell you how much i agree, with this young man, If i am asked to meet someone I want to put my best foot forward, and i would hope by them reading my profile they would already know. Sometimes you just have to spell it out, the only thing I like funky is my music.

  25. Kevone11

    I once met a guy working in a men’s clothing store,,we made a date and hit it off really well, we went to his apt.,got naked , had fun,,he had the worst tasting dick I,ve ever tasted,,,could not understand why,,,he was so cute,,but that really left a bad taste in my mouth,,,just bad chemistry I guess,,never saw him again, even though we lived in the same apt. Complex,,lol

  26. GuyNextDoor

    If a man can’t manage his own odor and smell, then that’s a red flag to me- what else does he not manage and pay attention to? No thanks, no way. The devil’s in the details. If you have an offensive smell, that says a lot about yout- and how you respect yourself and other people.

  27. R

    Really, I mean does Pablo or anyone else need to tell people that need to do that? He is correct IMO, a natural scent is great, but F’n stinking forget about it.

  28. Nathan


    You reacted…accordingly!

    Now, go put on one of your favorite Supremes’ albums, and throw your hands high up, reaching for the pie-in-the-sky.

  29. DesNeiges

    The scent of a man is a huge part of what makes him attractive. Too much deo and perfume, and I have no interest, and no basic hygiene, and I am also gone. As with so many things, it is about finding a balance. Diet makes a huge difference to how people smell, but it would be awkward to quiz someone about what he eats before meeting. Yet if I don’t like someone’s smell, and by this I mean natural, unadulterated body chemistry, then things are not going to work. What is definitely a plus is at the Mediterranean diet.

  30. Hotstamina

    Some men care so much about the anal cavity smell but neglect totally mouth hygiene! Unfortunately, it is a very common situation.

  31. SouthernBoiSB

    This needs clarification….are we talking about natural body scent or are we talking about not bathing scent?

    If it’s the latter, NO! If the former, it depends on the rest of our chemistry to see if that’s not an issue.

  32. Danny

    Im sorry to say this but there’s a lot of white guys who do not like showering or brushing their teeth more than once a day. I was even told by a few they hate showering and if they have to uts just with water and not soap/bodywash.

  33. James

    I’m an American who spends half his time in Korea. I prefer a type of deodorant which isn’t that easy to find even in US stores, so the first time I came here I brought a good supply of it with me.

    Turns out that would have been the right thing to do even if I weren’t choosy about brands — because underarm deodorant of any type is pretty hard to find, unless you go to a store that caters to Westerners. Most Koreans, and to a lesser extent East Asians in general, don’t possess the gene that makes them produce body odor. So there’s really no demand for it except from expats and tourists.

    That includes a Chinese-American friend of mine. And while he has a lush head of hair and pubes, the rest of him is naturally totally smooth. No facial hair to shave. Not a bit of underarm hair.

    So, to all the guys in this thread who are saying, “Men just naturally smell ‘like men'” or “men are hairy, that’s just the way it is” — well, no.

  34. Jon

    I have a FWB who has a BO problem. It doesn’t matter how much he bathes or commits to daily personal hygiene. He just naturally stinks. I tried messing around with him in the shower. Even with all the shower gel and anti-bacterial soap, it didn’t do much good. I even tried spraying him down with my best cologne, but nothing seemed to work. It’s like anything that smells good bounces right off him or gets killed by the BO. Don’t get me wrong. The sex is great, but damn, he stinks!

  35. rparktop

    I was told by a good friend that he could smell my body odor. It was in front of a cheerleader & I was really embarrassed I was a naive13yr old. If you smell something, say something.

  36. ndowd7

    08:48:00: Am
    (By my AWL) FP

    Yeah, thinking about this carefully, I really don’t like body odor when it comes to the general idea of body odor. If the body odor is from lack of deodorant, then perhaps, because I don’t usually lick armpits (sorry guys) and usually don’t like that done to me, cuz I’d be ticklish, then its usually a dealbreaker. I tend to like fresh out of the shower smelling guys, who are clean and fresh smelling. Cologne and or body spray helps too, but not necessary, cuz everyone has a scent and I prefer after a shower smelling guys to know that they are clean.

    Also – disclaimer, not that I wouldn’t get down and dirty either, cuz I like my piggy side too being fulfilled and so it really depends on the nature of the smell. Some guys have a smell that is fresh, others a natural scent which isn’t to say all guys have a bad scent either when they sweat, but I heard there is a difference between sweat stench and normal stench. I guess it really depends on how much you are attracted to the guy as well, but for me, I prefer what I have mentioned above.

    What do you guys think? If the scent I smell is a lingering BO then I tend to not want to pursue or engage in sex with that guy. And it doesn’t hurt to use deodorant or cologne, which may mask the smell if it is really bad, but if you smell fresh and clean like you just stepped out of a shower and you used soap or body wash, then that says a lot about how you prefer to smell – clean and fresh so you can let the pursuit of play begin with me at least.

    Take care,


    08:58:00: Am
    (By my AWL) FP

  37. Michael

    Colognes, heavy fragranced soaps, and deodorant are the deal breaker for me. I want to have sex with a man and have the man smell like a man. Who wants to burry their face and lick in a mans pits only to taste that dry and fowl taste of deodorant? Who wants to lick a mans neck and taste cologne? Yuck.

  38. John

    We all have preferences and desires. As individuals they are yours alone so judgement by others is wrong.
    My preference/desire are men like myself. Fresh and clean before sex. Inside and out. I hate body hair. Mine is shaved all over. I feel pubic, ass and armpit hair are just sponges for nasty smells. But to each their own!

  39. Jay

    Breath is the only picky point here. Everywhere else on the body is fun to explore and find the hot spots. Kind of let’s me know his mood.

  40. Derrick

    Some of these posts are pretty melodramatic. Many are just sanctimonious; some are bitchy. Few guys want to stink or choose to do so. Natural scent varies: for some a guy’s odor arouses, for others it is offensive. Some guys smell musky; some guys smell sour; some guys are more pungent than others. Unless you are picking guys up on the street they are unlikely to be foul; few guys chose to have smegma or dirty asses. If you are picking guys up before arranging a sex date, they might not be prepared. But spare us the self righteous, superior, and very arrogant attitude. Men who have an odor you don’t like are still people and still entitled to respect. Listen to yourselves.

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