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There’s a pattern many gay men are noticing, which is why they’re asking, why are so many well-endowed men choosing to bottom instead of top? Is it a matter of physical compatibility, personal preference, or are they just tired of expectations? And what does this reveal about how we view roles in the first place?
Anyway, we’re bringing this up because recently, we talked about what it’s like to have a huge penis, and one reader asked us a question back:
“I wouldn’t know, since I am about average at 6″. But I would enjoy hearing from those who are well-endowed. I’ve always been curious why so many hung men prefer to bottom. So, if anyone has any input on that, I’d be interested to hear it. Frankly, as a versatile person, I have found that technique is generally the most important factor.”
He isn’t the only one who’s curious. A similar discussion surfaced online, where another gay man asked:
“Why are so many hung guys bottom? Not that I’m complaining because it’s hot AF. I just find it amusing because they don’t usually send dick pics, but when you meet in person, they surprise you with a third leg.
Naturally, not all but the majority of bottoms I hook up with are hung or above average. Also, I find that a lot of tall and muscular guys are usually bottoms.”
One recurring answer from gay men is that being hung can actually complicate the experience of topping. As one gay man explained, “Topping when hung is a lot. A lot of guys can’t take it and back out. Sometimes guys will literally only be into you for your dick, which I personally don’t like.
A guy I met in October and hooked up with told his friend, who came up to me and asked if I’m ‘that guy with that big dick [his friend] sucked.’”
His answer highlights two realities: physical limitations and objectification. For some, topping becomes less about mutual enjoyment and more about performance or expectation.
Further, some responses also point to relationship dynamics and attraction. “Love me a hung bottom, my boyfriend is significantly bigger than me, and he’s the bottom in our relationship. It’s so hot when he’s riding me, and I see that big ole stick swinging around.” For many couples, the visual and emotional aspects matter just as much as the physical.
Another common frustration is expectation versus reality. “Seconding all of this! I’m vers, and everyone’s like ‘Oh, I bet you’re a bottom only.’ And I’m like mostly because y’all can’t handle it lol. It’s actually frustrating. Everyone wants to be bigger until reality hits.” For him, size becomes less of an advantage and more of a limitation when partners aren’t prepared or compatible.
Meanwhile, others kept it simple and direct. “Hung guys wanna get pounded too.”
Regardless of size, many men enjoy being on the receiving end. Sexual roles aren’t dictated by a gay man’s dick size—they’re shaped by what feels good.
In addition, experience also plays a role. “From what I’ve been told by a few, because I have asked, people can’t take them for a long time, or in general. I say practice makes perfect. I’m above average, and 75% of bottoms can’t take me for more than a minute or two.”
On the other hand, someone replied, “Hung doesn’t mean one has to top. Clear and simple. It’s not about cock but the mind and desires.”
Lastly, others pointed to something more practical: “Because we get tired of always doing the fucking.”
Taken together, these responses dismantle a long-standing stereotype. Being well-endowed doesn’t automatically define someone’s role—it can even push them in the opposite direction.
Having said all that, what about you, Adam4Adam blog reader? Do you agree with them?
Everyone talks about penis size, but does it really determine who tops and who bottoms? Why do so many guys assume bigger automatically means topping? What happens when reality doesn’t match the fantasy? And how much of this is driven by preference versus pressure?
More importantly, if you’re hung, has it influenced your preferences or how others approach you? Do expectations around dick size create pressure—or open new possibilities? And for those who’ve hooked up with hung bottoms, what stood out most about the experience? Share with us your thoughts and stories in the comments section below!
Too many bottoms! The top/vers/bttm isn’t one third each. Most of us prefer to get dicked.
Anyone who is asking this out of frustration is a GREEDY BOTTOM. Get out of the sling and show some appreciation to the man that just plowed you, unless you were lucky enough to find the perfect complimenting top.
HUNG IS APPENDAGE NOT MASCULINITY. HAVING A BIG DICK IS NO MORE INDICATIVE OF MASCULINITY THAN BIG TITS IS INDICATIVE OF FEMMINITY.
agreed! size is mass and mass not utilized property becomes a demerit. still is the motion-in-the-ocean!
Well if he has big tits I’d say he is a little more female then I am
CAN THAT BE POSSIBLE?
Looking at profiles over the years, there are many more Bottoms than Tops. Without any correlation to the size of their cock.
I DO love a giant dicked bottom!!
It doesn’t matter if you have a big cock or a small cock if you love to bottom you love to bottom. It’s an incredibly intense feeling which is why so many guys like it. I admit that I’m pretty much a total bottom, but I always make sure my top feels hugely appreciated and can enjoy the fun. A number of tops I know use dildos in their ass while they fuck me, and there’s been a number of times when the top who is fucking me was being fucked himself from behind. There’s always ways of making sure… Read more »
As a vers. with a nice sized 7-incher, my initial thought was, one has nothing to do with the other. But there may be a slight correlation: When I take a pounding, I get more turned on if the dom/top is smaller than me overall. Being 6’3, 215, I see it as sort of a role reversal.
I know exactly what you mean. I’m 6’5″, 230. Nothing turns me on more than getting naked and pounded by a 5’5″ guy. It doesn’t matter what size his dick is either. Just something about those shorter guys that rings my bell.
“Fun Size”?
To Hunter: yes, like a Mounds or Almond Joy bar – haha. To Tim: I think for me, it’s the idea that the top is typically a bigger person all around and controls what’s going on, which is what I do when I top smaller guys. So on those rare occasions when I’m dom’d and being topped by a smaller guy, although I’ve never been a fighter, I sort of equate it to as if the smaller guy and I were to fight, I’d kick his ass rather easily. So to equate that to sex with him being the dom/top,… Read more »
What does being hung have to do with it? And, being hung is not necessarily a benefit. Its appeal is often only visual. It’s certainly likely to be more uncomfortable in penetration of any kind. I think porn has been promoting anal sex for a long time, for visual appeal, and to be more like straight porn, and I think it has affected sexual behavior. In the 1970s, anal sex was not nearly so popular, as I recall.
Agreed! It was more about getting a blow job and having a bottom was something that was different. Not exactly rare, but it was different. Since I loved giving head that was perfect for me. Then I learned about straight guys and their love of bottoming.
Im a bottom. Love getting fucked! Size usually doesn’t matter if they’re good at topping. I do find that hung guys, 8+ for the most part dont get as hard. Which is more pleasurable that getting stabbed with a dick, that could pound a nail. But that could also be the reason they go towards bottoming. Thinking they’re not getting hard enough to stay hard til completion. Like all sizes as long as they are a considerate top!
That is a very good question,and very hard to answer,just like,why do married to real women,men like to bottom!I have had i share of tasting closest married men and love it!I guess its all in the mind.
I’m married to a woman, I still love pussy but I’m a 100% bottom with men. In fact I’m a very submissive bottom, I enjoy sucking a mans dick and getting fucked. Getting fucked to me is a truly amazing feeling, the idea of cumin just from anutha mans dick and knowing I’m satisfying anutha man at the same time, really does something for me
I consider myself a masc hung Verse Top. I love to take a fat dick in my hole, anytime. It feels great and sometimes instead of giving a good man a good pounding, I like to take one myself. That simple!
Probably dumbest topic yet and that’s saying alot on a4a blogs…
Sometimes the best tops have bottomed, that way they experience what it feels like from both “ends” (no pun intended) of the spectrum.
I agree… that a man who has bottomed and knows what feels good as well as what doesn’t…. is more likely to be more sensitive / thoughtful when topping. That has been my experience.
Agree. My current Partner who is a Great Top had Bottomed in the past and says he can relate more to the needs of a Bottom because he has been there. Having an athletic body 6’1 210 and very muscled, Everyone assumes he is All Top but he says he had some fun times as a Bottom but he prefers to be Pure Top nowadays. I had known him for several years socially but never really engaged on any one on one interactions but finally our paths crossed and one thing led to another. When we finally hooked up he… Read more »
There are men that like to get fucked and others have never tried it. It’s an amazing feeling when the right guys fuck you. Of course there is 1 out of 10 that may not like anal or oral. By the way, a big thick cock is a different experience. You have to know to handle them. A lot of bottoms think it takes no work to be pleasured. They’re lazy. That’s also why there so many pathetic bottoms. That man’s dick should be dripping with precum before he even enters you.
“That man’s dick should be dripping with precum before he even enters you.” What a HOT mental image!
When I am fucked just the right way, I feel it in my dick. Can’t explain the sensation, but when it’s right, I never have to touch my dick. I’ll cum faster and harder than any other way. Being hung or not, if you have felt that feeling, you crave it.
The bussy is a very sensitive muscle. When it’s stroked right it makes you scream for Jesus.
I’m not a woman, and I do not possess a pussy, I have an asshole and and men fuck it. I will not belittle myself with that dumb dumbass fucking word: bussy. Sorry, no, I don’t have a boy pussy. I am very comfortable within myself, and I feel no need to dress up what’s happening, with a fancy word… As if I’m trying to make the situation somehow more palatable. I get fucked in my ass, and that’s just fine with me.
So if a man was pounding you really good with 9 inches , he asks whose bussy is this. What are you gonna do?
Rip my ass off his dick and tell him we’re not compatible. I do not accept terms or labels that either degrade me make me feel less than I am. I am not a bitch, I am not a slut, I am not a whore. There are guys who enjoy being demeaned, but I do not find it sexy.
Though, in all seriousness, I would never have chose to be with somebody who would use those terms. It’s likely a person would reference those ideas in some way, beforehand, and I would decline any encounter.
Got it.
I can truly understand, it’s a wonderful feeling, it is so hard for me not to cum while getting fucked, that is the real reason why I enjoy it soooo much, the first time I came while getting fucked without touching myself, I new I was hooked, I know bottoms that have never came while getting fucked, that is hard for me to understand, it seems to come so naturally for me, I can cum multiple times if I’m fucked long enough, and on top of that, I just enjoy getting fucked, that feeling of having a man with a… Read more »
Just a bullshit GENERALIZATION! Just as MANY hung bottoms as SMALL ones ~~ and VICE VERSA.
TOO MANY BOTTOM OUT THERE!!!
Agree……………in some locations it is an INFESTATION.
Because it feels so very good.
Masculine hung bottoms like to be bottomed because they want someone else in control..to dominate them and make them feel the way they’ve treated people
Big dick guys have a larger and more sensitive root to their penis. This makes getting penetrated more arousing.
Reality is, most all guys prefer bttm, not just hung ones. It’s merely that bttms consider it a shame, or a waste of a great tool when it’s a hung guy who bottoms. But hung ones prefer to bttm about the same amount as average, and below average guys do … tt’s about a 10:1 ratio of bttms to tops, no matter what the dick size.
It has to do with hormones—testosterone and estrogen. Alphas more testosterone tend to have shorter but girthier penises and Betas tend to have thinner and longer. There was a survey and book written by a psychologist years ago of his surveying thousands of men who have sex with men. The Betas tended to be more Bottoms/Versatiles while Tops were Alphas but the Alphas could experiment with positionality. The distribution though works out that 20% of men fall into Alpha range due to testosterone, however half of all natural Alpha-higher testosterone men are in the closet due to mindset seeking of… Read more »
I don’t believe for a minute that you can abstract hormonal assay with whether one is a bottom or not. Bottoming might be a regular meal, or a transient-in-the-moment endeavor. The Alpha/Beta rubric is more fueled by testosterone fantasy than the realities of sensation and promiscuity.
Promiscuity absolutely explains STD spread, but today’s statistics don’t reward the millions now on some form of PrEP or other prophylaxis. This mistake of correlation-equals-causation is the same mistake made over and over and over.
He did a survey of 3000 men which includes 4 dimensions that hormones affect and effect—mentally, physically, intellectually, social.
If one is “born this way” based upon biology—why wouldn’t biology, like every other species be affected/effected by biological hormones?
Read the book, take the ABMS and see how your physicality—hair rotational growth, body structure-dimensions, finger length, hip to shoulder ratio, hair growth, facial structure—all biological things influenced by….biological, inner hormones, right?
But sexuality completely untouched by genetics and hormones?
WTF ! …. I’d be surprised if the study you base all this on would have any basis in real academic research. What is…. “670 %”..? This sounds to be just verbiage / gobble-de-goop !
The absolute last thing I want to know about a guy is how big he is, and whether he is a top or bottom. I have never concerned myself with big dicks, I have had up 14 inches, but prefer smaller. I do NOT bottom, why? Because it is painful for me. Always has been. So if a guy wants a top then that’s, but they have to understand that I do not believe in turnabout being fair. I have noticed that guys with big dicks do like to bottom, and that is great. I put their legs over my… Read more »
It feels so damn good, that’s the reason why, and that the reason why it has so many bottoms, , which is the main reason many guys are gay, they wanted to get fucked, Most knew they were going to like it before the ever got fucked, especially for a 100%bottom because a bottom most of the time has a genuine love for dick, And the dick feels so good, especially when a guy makes you cum with his dick, and for me the idea of being used sexually by dominant man, being submissive to him seems to get me… Read more »
The largest living guy on record is 13.5, so there’s a little problem with this love story, bitch. Get it together.
Im nearly 7 inches. I seem to attract 9+ guys who need to be pounded, and they generally like to call me back for more
When I’m with a well hung man, I tend to focus on all the other parts of his body. Because they are so use to everyone focusing on their dick, they seem to enjoy the fact that I come at them differently. They appreciate me for doing the things to them that they usually do to others. I’m naturally masculine and I’m attracted to masculine guys, so I come across this situation frequently. Also, since I don’t bottom often, I’m actually showing them what to do to me to get me to bottom for them. I’m old school. I was… Read more »
I think some hung guys are just like me…. wired to get fucked. I knew at an early age that I wanted to take dick up my ass. It doesn’t matter how big a guy’s dick is, what matters is what he wants out of a sexual partner. I love to bottom. I admit I like looking at a big dick and I’d love to take aa really big dick up my ass at least once before I die. The biggest I’ve taken was 7.5 inches. Most guys I meet are of average size and they were all good tops… Read more »
I myself knew at a very young age that I wanted to get fucked, like I’ve said in other comments, I’ve never had a desire to top a guy never , I don’t even like guys to touch my dick , I let guys know this upfront, most of the guys I’ve been with not into dicks anyway,, they are 100% ass men, so I think I’m wired to be fucked, I think that’s why I cum so naturally while getting fucked, and I also had a thing for dicks, I always had a dick fetish, as I got older… Read more »
That train of thought is for “exclusive bottoms/ or sz queens.” As a large sized, large-dicked man; one can “bottom” for more than just dick, unless of course your sexually narrow-minded and just flat-out into just vanilla sex. The very large and naturally in charge men like to see how the other half lives, experiences sex from another point of view.
As a vers top, I enjoy large dicks. Not necessarily to bottom, but to stroke and suck. I have encountered several hung bottoms who don’t want to be touched down there, even when they have a raging hard on. It is frustrating, but I respect their decision. I am like, can you share a lil’ bit of that big dick? Can I just nibble on it a lil’ bit?
Two things I do Not like are Well Hung Tall Bottoms or really Short Hung Tops………neither would work for Me and I would laugh myself right out of the room Not interested. (Tall Guys with small dicks is also a turn off).