(Photo Credits: sam100 from Shutterstock)
What feels better for you guys, getting fucked or doing the fucking? Or does it depend on the moment? Does it matter to you whether you’re doing the bottoming or topping? Why or why not?
A gay man online shared frankly what he prefers: “Off my chest, getting fucked by a man is the best feeling in the world. Nuff said.”
That kind of statement tends to split the room. Some instantly agree, while others feel the exact opposite, and that’s okay because we can’t all be tops or bottom. But what about you, Adam4Adam blog readers, do you prefer topping, bottoming, or staying versatile depending on the situation? And has that preference always been the same, or did it change over time?
Anyway, one gay man responded, “Sorry, it can’t beat the feeling of fucking a nice and smooth bubble butt ‘til you cum deeply.”
On the other side, there’s a very different kind of experience, one that’s only known to gay men on the receiving end, like this guy who shared, “Yeah, I know. The initial pain, the pure bliss after, the hard orgasms, then his hot cum flowing in. Ohh, I can’t wait to get fucked.”
In addition, one guy said, “Agreed, once I got past my homophobia and learned to accept that I loved it, there is no better sex for me. It’s amazing!” For some gay men, having sex isn’t just physical; it’s tied to unlearning stigma and embracing what actually feels right for them.
Then there are others who kept their response simple and direct: “It feels great when he cums in me.”
Further, one guy replied, “Yes. Especially when he cums all over you, and you lie next to each other just breathless. Personally, I think it’s so much better than with a girl.”
Meanwhile, there are also guys who tried anal sex later than other gay men. He confessed, “I’m 26 and bottomed for the first time after seeing a guy and started dating after a few weeks. Mind you, I had been really embarrassed about never topping/bottoming by this age. I have bottomed like four times since then, and him cumming in me is literally the best feeling emotionally and physically.”
Then there are those still on the edge of curiosity and who have never tried having sex before: “I wanna try some dick so bad.”
As in everything in life, there’s no single answer. Some gay men prefer topping while others prefer bottoming. Many enjoy both, depending on the mood, the partner, or their chemistry.
Having said all that, Adam4Adam blog readers, what about you? What satisfies you more, and why? Share with us your thoughts and stories in the comments section below!
Far too many guys in the MSWM category fixate on being versatile and can’t fathom that someone would prefer to bottom only, and are immediately turned-off by guys who don’t top. Yet, THEY’RE largely looking to bottom themselves, even though the first thing they want you to know about them is they’re versatile…but, they really rather “want to try bottoming” or however they phrase it as a “vers top”.
Been fooled far too many times.
OMG you ain’t lying. They all come with that same ol line! Lol
Really?!?
I just really like sex but this explains some of the hairy eyeballs I’ve gotten here I’ll have to be less casual with discussing this in the future so things are clearer
As a true authentic versatile top, I agree to an extent. Maybe since I don’t mind topping, it’s not a major issue with me because bottoms and vers guys hit me up online all the time, as well offline. None the less I have been with other true versatile tops who are genuinely interested in flipping. However, hookup and gay dating sites are saturated with bottoms and vers guys, so I top like 90% of the time. Again, I don’t mind, but when I get an itch back there for some dick, I don’t even bother with vers/vers bttms… my… Read more »
I frankly don’t end up scoring with many online guys I’ve messaged.. but you’re right that MOST of the vers and vers/bttm guys seem to really seek to be topped. I enjoy topping them, though I AM fully versatile and equally love being skewered by someone I am attracted to.
I have 2 fuck buddies I’ve been seeing for years. One is African- American and the other is Caucasian. My black buddy and myself take turns fucking each other. When I’m with my Caucasian buddy, I’m strictly top. It works out very well.
Proud of you!
There’s my African American!
Wish you were HERE, sexy Matt
Feelings mutual. Mos def.
I miss you too, baby. I came 3 times that night. dat zzz tho!
Have no idea who you are. Lol
Always the bottom, never the Top. I wouldn’t have it any other way. I am meant to be a bottom.
If your buddy ass is as good as yours, bring him over next time. I can take turns on ya!
I have no idea who you are. Lol
Are you saying that an Caucasian man can’t get any of your ass? What’s up with that?
No sir. I didn’t say that at all. I was addressing the Adam blogger in regard to my personal situation. At the end of the blog subject, the blogger ask us how we individually feel in regard to the subject matter. He wants our opinion on the subject and for us to share our personal journey as it aligns with the subject.
I love both equally. I’m not a total bottom or total top. The best sex I’ve ever had was “flip fuckig”.
Flip fucking is the ultimate
Not you having the same name as me and loving what I used to love doing during my earliest youth! That’s so crazy! Lmao! Glad I caught that, cause I knew damn well I did not write that sentence to Todd lol. Now that I’m aware that there’s another fellow Kevin here, I’ll have to change mines to Kevin27 or something lol.
So I’m blindfolded and have to decern which Kevin is which It would help if I could parse them sans blindfold of course but I’ll meet the challenge nonetheless and do My very best no matter what A man’s gotta do… https://youtu.be/lIXJEpLOkeg?si=TLCobFZvCJK-xbdL
But, it’s not for everyone. Some vers guys will actually get upset at someone who isn’t. ESPECIALLY if the person they’re upset at doesn’t top.
Men are just so dumb and weird with their expectations and labels. Bunch of divas.
Agreed. Flip fucking is the greatest of all worlds!!
It all depends on who I am with. I’m on the tall side so a shorter guy with a nice ass makes me want to tap that thing day and night. If he is taller than 6-foot then my inner bottom wants the nonstop attention!
Being a bttm with a submissive side I luv feeling him in deep and cumming
Good boy!
Same here, I am a bisexual 100% bottom when with men , and I make it perfectly clear, and I only hookup with 100% total tops, that way there’s no misunderstanding, we’re but getting what we need, because I have no desire to top a guy, I get off on being submissive, getting fucked, pleasing and being used as a bottom,
I have never topped or bottomed.I am wanting to try to be a bottom to see how it feels to have a cock inside of me and feel it tense up and squirt hot cum in me deep.The older I get the more I want to try it
You aren’t promised tomorrow buddy. I suggest you find a good man that knows how to Top and work patiently with a first-time bottom. Time is a wastin’ . . . get fucking!
The longer you wait the longer you will regret for not starting sooner.
I suggest you find an experienced top. I would get to know him a little and build a friendship. Avoid a top who have problems maintaining a good firm erection. Your ass is very tight and you as a rookie need a rock hard dick to penetrate you. A confident experienced top with a brick hard throbbing dick will patiently coach you through the whole initial process. As a rookie bottom, you will need him to follow your commands and stop when you say so. Sometimes even experienced bottoms need the top to stop because of the pain or the… Read more »
Excellent advice, Being a bottom should be pleasure not pain.
LOVE the way YOU do it sexy MATT!
Thank jazzy Jeff!! Looking forward to us doing it. Lol
Great tips for those novice Bottoms. I was Vers for many years but with the right Top the sky is the limit. My current BF is skilled with the touch, the attitude and the technique that makes a Bottom comfortable even when he resorts to Manhandling you to the point you just want to say “Do whatever the hell you want to Me”. While most Tops do prefer a nice tight hole (and there are exercises you can do to tighten up) I have also been with a few well hung Guys that said they prefer a loose gaping hole… Read more »
I’m not sure how old you are, but you should go on and try it , you may be mad with yourself for waiting too long to try it, but getting fucked is a wonderful feeling, especially if you have a top that knows how to take you there, and if you experience what it’s like to cum handsfree, it’s unbelievable,
Hump, Matt’s advice will not work for you. You will have to take it slower if you experience anal. When you are really eager enough, it will come naturally. Matt has a different mindset. Mentally, he is a woman trapped in a man’s body. He also has an hour glass figure (long legs with a juicy booty). He can absorb cock much easier than you.
I love doing the butt fucking,I love ass period,kissing,licking it or just rubbing on it,watching guys walk by and feeling my dick head itch,lol.The heat and smell from another guy’s ass can be mind blowing.I tried it in my younger years,it wasn’t my thing(bottoming),being a top is my pleasure!I have nothing but respect for bottom men,they can please you better than women can,if you have hunger for homo sex!Married closest men have the best ass and will give you the best sex.
very nicely put but my wife wants to bury my fav strapon big your ass while you pound my hole
You need to let me jump on that sweet black bussy. That last man didn’t treat you right. You might change your mind after a few rounds with me. Lots of black guys enjoy me
You sound just like my Partner, who is ALL Top…….he wants to finger, eat and fuck the hell out of his Bottom. Have them begging for it. I feel that I hit the Jackpot with Him because we really play off each other and know what to expect. He does have a dirty mind that really doesn’t match his appearance or his profession but it is probably Why I am intrigued and the sparks FLY. All depends on the match up.
Neither! strictly, an Oral Boy!
Action speaks louder than words… .
Nothing wrong with that. I was oral only for a long time, until I tried bottoming and found out I love it.
Not into anal. Not wired for it. There’s no pleasure, no “WOW!”.
But I “take one for the team” now and then for two of my FWBs who enjoy and appreciate that I bottom for them.
:: rolls eyes :: SUUUUUURE!
Lots of WOW for me. Feeling his dick throb and tasting his cum, leaves me wanting another dick to suck. Prefer a guy to pull out deposit in my throat.
I was fucked by a black guy when I was very young … I knew my place after that … I’ve tried topping before and just didn’t care for it … I’m a cumdump bttm for black and brown men’s use …
Once I started didn’t take lo ng to be Black and Men of Color Only.
My fondest wish and favorite fantasy is to be gangbanged by a bunch of BBCs, taking there big black cocks deep in my mouth and cock craving white ass.
Whoa! Most times whenever one of those Brown guys topped me, it made me feel like a virgin girl taking it …They always give it sooooooooooo deep and so good!
You guys always think that racial fetishization shit is cute.
Please don’t start any trouble. Everyone is having an good time.
Don’t do it much but when possible it’s definitely getting fucked for this guy and if the TOP drops off his kids in my guts that’ makes it ten times better !!!
nothing more intimate and hotter than taking a huge load of baby batter in your gutt!!
Haven’t taken any baby batter I. My guts yet but would definitely like to experience it some day.
I have topped occasionally but ever since I was 15 I knew that I was a bottom. It’s just how I feel like I’m wired but I make sure that I’m the kind of bottom that makes his top feel incredibly valued and aroused and satisfied. I love giving a guy oral for a very long time until he’s ready to fuck me and when he does I refuse to just lie there but I move my hips to meet his thrusts. I’m very vocal and encourage and tell him how amazing his cock feels inside me. I want to… Read more »
WOW! You described me exactly! I dont just do it for my pleasure. I make it all about my partner and get extreme enjoyment for myself in the process. Well stated.
I want to be the best bottom the top has ever had, everytime I bottom. That is my sole purpose. my pleasure comes from the top getting pleasure.
Exactly. It’s a total turn-off for me if I’m with a “top” who’s disappointed that I don’t need/want to cum and would rather make sure that he does.
Last week I had a top who fucked me for quite a while and kept telling me I had the best hole he ever had….tight and grinding back on his cock. I love when I can please the top like that.
And getting feed back is always good. It is good to know when you are doing something good, or when you need to improve. I always focus on the pleasure of the Top.
Oh absolutely. I love saying things to the top like”God your cock feels so good, give me that huge cock of yours.. I want to feel you fuck me nice and deep….I want your load deep in my ass” and things like that. Lots of moaning to on each thrust. And I love grabbing their ass and pulling them in deeper. Make sure your top feels in control and powerful and that he has the best cock ever. And after he cums inside you, make sure you let him know what a privilege it is to take his cum.
If you don’t compliment, It is like going for a meal at a friends house, and not thanking them, or saying how got it was.
When i was young i just assumed i was supposed to bottom . Older top guys love persuing me. Then at a group thing i took my first ass. For years after i topped. Now Im back to bottoming. Condoms killed it fir me. topping. Love the feeling of a buddy sliding in me and thrusting deep watching his face when he gets close and cums in me! That look of pure extacy on his face and knowing i brought him there
Similar to you; I’ve found enjoyment in both topping and being bottom. Also.. using condoms sometimes killed the erection for me. Again, like you..watching my partner reach orgasm while inside me..his eyes widen or roll back…his mouth forming a sensuous “O” as he fills me with his semen. Damn !
I never bottom ‘anally for penile entry,’ never, that said, I’m a humper-grinder, I naturally use my dick.
Bottoms want guys like you. Always perfer a top vs a versatile guy. In farm animals a dual purpose cow means it can used for milk and beef, but isn’t as good as a cow bred for milk That is why I like total tops.
I’m a married bi guy with a bi wife and I love to top bottoms that really enjoy having a big cock deep in them. I did flip fuck with one of my lovers but it was just for his pleasure as it did little for me. Some of us are just tops, plain and simple.
Oh I love getting fucked. Feeling like a slut as he’s fucking me talking dirty. Then my reward an ass full of cum dripping out as I leave just like the slut I am.
Hi guys, I have been wanting to bottom for awhile now. And have tried to hook-up with guys here on adam4adam. But it seems like no one wants to fuck. I have topped many times and yes I love it. I only wish that I could enjoy it both ways. I have experiment with my dildo and love it, but just not the same as the real thing. Any ideas that I could try, thank you for reading.
I’m pretty much consider myself a top. Guess I like being “da man” with a dude! Sucking my guy off and having him on top of me making love to me feeling the weight his frame on me is about as bottom as I get.
I’m a total top who doesn’t even like my butt touched.
What do you think I will answer with?
Damn you are super Butch!
A bottom’s job is to be the bottom you want.
One of the few, unfortunately.
If given the choice I prefer Bottom but with the right Partner I have no problem taking on a Top role. I tend to be attracted to Bigger, Athletic built Guys that like that Alpha Male role so it pretty much becomes a fact that I am on my knees or on my back once they check out my backside. I do like to give Oral but not obsessed with it but prefer a Top that knows what the hell he is doing and is high energy in the bedroom. I have been with hung Tops that are Lazy and… Read more »
Being a small dicked white guy I couldn’t imagine trying to be a top. 100% submissive bottom. I know, embrace and love my place as a bottom.
Flip fuck all the way.
This zebra likes’ to be pumped by big bois’! Let me sit on it and take you for a big thigh ride! My 50/50 is mouth and ass!
i am a pure bottom i love being fucked feels so good to me
Me too.
This question is for me, totally funny:) Why? Because having been a member of A4A for years now, it has become completely clear that the majority of those seeking encounters sexually with others as 100% BOTTOMS! LOL:)
As a former verse guy 9 years ago (nowadays strictly top) both positions used to be pleasurable to me as I used to be very into flipfucking back then. I was very underage at the time so definitely will not put the exact age when I started having sex with my fellow peers. I was going through puberty so I had an extremely high sex drive which is probably why I loved both roles equally at the time. Then life happens and my versatility is gone forever. Now as an adult, I’m just too dominant and masculine to bottom or… Read more »
You are just the type guy a sub bottom like me wants. As a bottom being dominated and bred is what i want.
I love being passionately bred so fucked and filled but slowly and passionately, quickies really kind of suck
I don’t wait it quick, I want a dick as hard as a brick, I want a dick like a pogo stick, I want a dick in like yardstick. I want it slow, just don’t bust a nut and go.
bottom only
Total bottom here, I tried topping once but it just wasn’t for me
me too.I love pleasing a top.
I am looking forward this year to take the cherry of a cute boi. Give him his first romantic nut with my big fat cock. He will have a bubble butt and athletic body. 2026 goals
Go Get It!
Good fucks cum is all sizes.
Total bottom here, and there is nothing better to me then a man having his way with me, fucking me how he likes.
I enjoy being a bottom. I Love to have my prostate pounded till I cum. I love to feel a hard cock fill me up with his big creamy load. I start at a young age being a bottom and still enjoy it.I also can top but prefer being a bottom.
Currently I have pretty been exclusively a Bottom but then again I am only doing it with a Guy I have been dating. He likes to Top and made it clear from the outset. I figured Make My Day and let’s See what you Bring…….just keep it hard, no five minutes and Blow or chances are it will never work. Fortunately he is passionate and open to lots of things but what made him stand out was when he asked How do You like it? Some Tops could care less and just want to Pound You. He liked that I… Read more »
I’m versatile and enjoy both positions. For me a lot depends on my mood and my partner.
I agree flip fucking is the “ultimate” after a nice long oral session…
Been exploring long enough with men and women long enough, consider myself straight as I am fully attracted to women, love connections with a man. In terms of physical pleasure, absolutely nothing compares to having a man enjoying fucking me.
Thank you for sharing, Miss Lindsay Graham.
LOL!
HE PREFERS MS, PLEASE! Lololol
It depends. I am clearly vers so sometimes I like to fuck while other times I like to be fucked. I guess it just depends on the situation.
As a black man, I must top. I don’t really mind because I love the Mandingo role. I love to be tease with those beautiful pink holes. I get an rush seeing a man kneel for my big black dick. I have fucked men in front of their wives.
A black bottom is a waste of good dick. Black men fuck better. Thank you for fucking us.
Only thing better than BBC is fine black ass !
I don’t know what school you went to!
Cock is far more valuable than ass….any race, you can just fill in the blanks.
I much more prefer to be the bottom, I am small cock wise, my first bf when I was 13 taught me to suck and to b I atom. He was 15 and was 8.5 in. I am also short I like on my back where I can wrap my short legs around my guy a d make out while he ducks me. That way I can look in his eyes when he cums Inside me
Damn, you took 8.5 inches at 13 years old? Lawd have mercy
I feel like I used to like topping but with as rare as I do hook up with guys it’s always too short an experience and ultimately not worth it. But definitely prefer fucking over getting fucked cause…
Only ever ‘successful’ time I bottomed 20+ years ago, dude got it in and it felt good with how it was going and he decided to just go at it knowing I was virgin there… so it completely has ruined any future chance of even trying…
I am completely Verse with a leaning toward Top since I am more dominant. Nothing like great anal sex between men in whatever form that arrives in. For hookups I allow the flow to be organic but when looking for LTR I seek men that are either completely Verse or completely bottom. If a dude isn’t into kissing, making out like good men should, and anal, unless I am servicing a dick through a GH I am usually not interested.
Prefer to fist
First time I bottomed, I was in missionary position and found out I really enjoyed having a dick thrusting in and out. Legs were up and cock was giving me pleasure. My favorite position.
Have to agree love missionary
I’ve tried bottom a few times. It does nothing for me. But topping is something I love. It gives a feeling like nothing else. Rimming my bottom lover while he is sucking me gets me so ready to fuck him as we actually make love. Like different positions too. But love to end where we can kiss as we cum. Missionary or him riding but kissing as we cum is so intimate and makes it so intense.
I love topping a nice smooth ass the shoot my load in him
Used to top but made the journey in every increment to total bottom. I love pursuing encounters where it’s known from the jump that I’m there to pleasure his cock, that mine is superfluous unless he fucks a load out of me, and that his seed shot as far into my asshole as possible is the mutual goal. Flipping is fun too, but the single mindedness of being a pure bottom and knowing and feeling that he wants my holes and not my cum is my ideal
I’ve wanted to try bottoming but I’m afraid. I hear how great the experience is however. My anxiety comes from not knowing how to be sure I’ve prepped correctly to the anticipated pain of it. I’ve always preferred to side.
What matters is the playmate more than anything else for Me As someone who went through a painfully shy phase and seriously considered Myself as strictly hetro as the passes Id had from men were markedly bad as in awkward, inebriated, pushy and obnoxious and it wasn’t until I was asked politely that I found I wasn’t hetro, extreamly prudish and ashamed of sex and its inherently dirty nature finding sex can be something that makes all concerned feel good about themselves afterwards even after doing things that hetroMe would have DEFINITELY judged as shameful so maybe its a versatile… Read more »
100% agree. It’s the chemistry with the dude that sets everything in motion. Once alone, nature takes it where it may and I get the joy out of just knowing I’m pleasing him. Mechanically, getting fucked (mouth or rear) is the best and I love the feel of hot cum in my mouth the best. My whole queer career started jerking off to male pix but was an emotional basket case out of my own homophobia. First sex, I received a blow job in a train station and went into full guilt mode. A friend, not knowing my feelings, kept… Read more »
Never got much from topping. Being fucked is my ultimate sex. I can’t be with a guy without trying to get him in me. I’m a very vocal, passionate bottom. Feeling his whole body tense, seeing his face. And hearing him when he cums always puts be over the edge.
When I first had a gay encounter, we jerked off on each other’s cocks. Shortly after, I bottomed for him. He had a gorgeous, 8″ cock. It was a lot for my virgin ass to take. But having a part of his cute body up inside me was amazing. I bottomed for him for 6 years. I topped with a woman, but bottomed for him. Years later, when I met the guy I’ve been with for 27 years, it was amazing to flip fuck, getting a taste of both. Each time we’d fill each other up and satisfy each other’s… Read more »
I go in spurts, top top top top, bottom bottom bottom top bottom
Love fucking a guy then I love being fucked.
Best of all worlds.