Will you have sex with a friend, guys? Maybe the more appropriate question is: can you have sex with them without strings attached? We are asking because we always stumble upon these questions, and do friends with benefits (FWB) even work?
Dictionary.com defines FWB as a “friend someone occasionally has casual sex with.” Except that in this kind of relationship, there is no commitment and definitely, there’s no romantic involvement between the two parties.
And some gay men on Reddit say yes, it works, like for this guy who said that he’s “had a lot of friends with benefits over the years.” But will it work for others? He said he’s not certain because this kind of relationship requires “some flexibility, open-mindedness, and maturity.” Another guy, on the other hand, said, “One person usually gets attached and the other doesn’t. It’s just a matter of time.”
But what do experts say?
Studies have shown that it does work, but like everything else in this life, you’ve got to make an effort to make it so. The two of you need to talk and set boundaries, to learn to compartmentalize, and recognize that like all the other kinds of relationships out there, communication is the key. You need to talk about using protection, define expectations, and if you caught feelings for your FWB? Then you will have to tell him because honesty is always the best policy. And if the other party wants to stop because they found someone else and they want to be in a relationship with that person, then you will have to let him go and move on because that’s what you signed up for.
More importantly, if you are someone who has a tendency to be jealous or if you like the other person, then you might not be cut out for this, according to dating coach Dave Stultz of The Fearless Man. He explained, “FWB relationships are interdependent style relationships so … you must respect the other person’s decisions and lifestyle.” Stultz added, “This person is not your girlfriend or boyfriend, so you have no say in what they do and who they do it with.” Read more here and here.
What about you, guys, have you ever had a friends with benefits relationship with someone else? How did it go for you? If not yet, will you enter into a friends with benefits set up? Why or why not? Share with us your thoughts and stories in the comments section below!