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Speak Out: Why We Need to Talk About Masturbation

(Photo Credits: Efes Kitap from Pixabay)

Recently we talked about how much is too much when it comes to sex and one of our readers mentioned masturbation which brings us to our topic today: do you masturbate guys, and if so, how often? Do you masturbate daily, three times a week, three times a month, or maybe you used to masturbate before but you no longer do it and if so, why not? 

In any case, if your answer is yes, then you are one of the 94 percent of the LGBT people who admitted that yes, they do masturbate. Also, where do you masturbate most? 

The same survey says that most men in the United States masturbate in their bedroom at 73 percent although there were other popular places such as the bathroom at 35 percent and the shower at 32 percent. And yes, there were others who also love masturbating in their cars (6 percent) and in their workplace at 3 percent. 

When asked how often the survey participants masturbate, 60 percent answered at least once a week while 23 percent of them said they masturbate a few times a month. In addition, the survey found that the country that masturbates the most is Spain at 92 percent followed by UK (91 percent), Germany (89 percent), and the US at 84 percent. Read the rest of the report here.

But why talk about masturbation at all? Isn’t there a saying that what happens in the bedroom stays in the bedroom?

Well, not exactly; in fact, experts actually encourage people to talk more about masturbation and sexual health because doing so is beneficial to our mental health. According to San Diego-based gay psychologist Michael Dale Kimmel, “Bringing all this stuff out in the open is definitely a boon to our mental health. Shame, guilt and secrecy about sexual activities makes us more unhappy and troubled.” 

That being said, do people in a relationship talk about masturbation with their significant other? Sixty-five percent of the men said yes as opposed to women at 54 percent. On the other hand, the following are the popular answers when those who said no were asked why they are not comfortable talking about masturbation with their significant other and we quote:

  • It’s a private matter that doesn’t need discussing
  • I don’t know how to talk about it with them
  • I’m embarrassed that I masturbate
  • I don’t want my partner to know or feel bad that I masturbate

Do you feel the same way, guys? Please share with us your thoughts and masturbation stories and don’t forget to answer our survey below while you are at it!

There are 17 comments

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  1. Jim

    I think in this day and age no one should feel any shame by the fact they masturbate or how often they do or do not do it. We are all individuals with very different sexual needs and drives. While sex with you partner can be great, it may not be enough if you have a higher than average sex drive. It is a better option if you are in a committed relationship than random hook ups. Seriously your hand or toy is the one partner that will never tell you no.

  2. Hunter0500

    I’m thinking someone needs to hear about our masturbating a lot more than we need to talk about it. Lol

    Ok so it’s all up to Hunter0500 Jr. He rules the show about how often he and I have a “date”. On average once or twice a week, regardless of any play time(s) we may have had with buds. Sometimes, however, it’s once per day (or twice) for over a week. Again, regardless of any play time(s) we may have had with buds.

    I’m happy to follow his lead.

    For many guys, it’s a personal thing. Something they keep to themselves …
    probably because that’s what Mom and/or Dad taught (or implied).

    My buds and I will sometimes masturbate each other simultaneously. There are times when we masturbate ourselves while kissing each other. And times when one of us sets back and masturbates while the other watches and/or works other body parts of the one masturbating. Watching a bud masturbate shows you how he likes to be “handled” (stroke length, location, speed, tightness of grip, etc.) Of course, there’s the option where your bud lays back and you masturbate him touching only his cock, nothing else.

    All great options for good playful sex!

  3. Paul

    When I was young it was nothing to jerk off 3 times a day. As I got older two things happened. First is I’m not as constantly horny. In my teens and twenties I always had a hard on and to relieve myself…bedroom, bathroom, work lavatories, school lavatories. In my fifties I don’t have that raging boner all day. The second thing is that I had no sex partners when I was younger. Masturbation was my only sex. Today I get off by hooking up and consider wanking only when I can’t find anyone to share my semen.

  4. Nathan

    Nathan Zane:

    A daily jerk-off keeps the prostate supple and disease-free. The prostate is a gland and a gland needs to be stimulated.

    The reason why so many older males develop enlargement and cancer is that the prostate is no longer stimulated and thus becomes harden.

    There is an old adage that still rings true: “use it or lose it.”

  5. marc

    fuck! my partner and I jackoff together…. showoff… goon. HOT to do it at a bath house or somewhere else you can be watched!! WOOF!

  6. John Bierwirth

    I am almost 74 and rarely get a erection,myy arms and hands get weak. I go to the adult theater and hope to get a b j, if .not I watch other guys get sucked off,I get a hard on and masterbate

  7. G

    Definitely masturbate. A few times a week ranging from a few times a day to two or three times a week. It is a great release and is part of my larger sexual practice. As long as it doesn’t get in the way of other everyday living, don’t see how it can be bad.

  8. Clark Barr

    Nothing gets me off more than jacking off with a buddy when we watch bodybuilder contest videos. We also love to jack off to Muscle Hunk videos when they jack off.

  9. buz

    I’m 71 yo and I masturbate pretty much daily. There is no particular place or time. Of course if I’m watching porn that usually does it. But often in the shower or while watching TV. When I’m sitting around the house I usually have my hand on my cock and depending the mood and available time it often leads to rubbing one out.
    Having a partner, or not, does not change the behavior but often limits it since there is someone else around. I don’t mind talking to my partner about my habit but don’t make a point of bringing it up nor do I avoid the conversation. It has nothing to do with my feelings toward him or how our sex life is going. It’s not a threat to either one of us. Just something that’s enjoyable and when the mood and opportunity arise I don’t see why not. It’s not necessarily a plan or a goal just something to do.
    I feel pretty much the same as giving or receiving a blo job. Mood and opportunity and I’ll suck a dick that I like and happy to have mine sucked. Whether it be while watching The Real Housewives or reading a book. Hey, it’s just a blow job…
    I have found a lot of guys like jacking off in their cars and even blo jobs. Have done that quite a bit but a little more complicated and clean up is sometimes a problem. But lots of guys will drive around with their cocks out.
    I think men are really lucky that their cocks that are so accessible and can just be fun and then move on to the next errand.

  10. bjjj

    Speaking of bathhouses, gosh I wish there was one within reasonable distance from where I’m at The closest one is about a 7 hour drive for me, which is in Saint Louis. I sure hope they make a comeback.

  11. Friar Chicken

    A friend of mine, straight, would masturbate five-to-six times a day, including in the bathroom at work. When he lost that job, I suggested that they might have figured out what he was doing. I think that much is compulsive.

  12. tono

    i do masturbate at least 2 or 3 times a week, i’m a very sexual person and sometimes i get horny by looking at hot guys at work or on the street, i’m not ashamed of it; on the contrary, i’m very comfortable with my sexuality and i think i’m happier because of it lol besides i do have sex, but i like my dick a lot and it gets plenty of attention……….

  13. Cory

    I usually masturbate at least once a day, sometimes more if i’m home and get bored. I normally do it in the bedroom or bathroom, but have been know to do it other places too.

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