I’ve read this question today twice online on separate sites albeit phrased differently: Can you be gay and religious at the same time? Do you “go to church even if some religions condemn homosexuality?” Why or why not?
Some said yes, others said no, but there are also quite a few who said they’re atheists and couldn’t care less while another one said no, he doesn’t go to church because “religion is a little silly.”
One of those who said we can have both—that religion/spirituality and sexuality aren’t mutually exclusive at all—argued that “God is love and we are created in that loving image.” He added that God’s one true command is for us to “love one another.” Another pointed out that, “Religion isn’t homophobic. People are.” On the other hand, those who said no, they don’t go to church anymore; reasoned that it’s because “people from church were nasty to me” and “some people can come off as resentful towards the LGBT community, along with the hypocrisy.” Other sentiments I’ve read include, “some of their beliefs are hurtful” and that “God isn’t real.”
Personally, I think “hurtful” is an understatement. If you’ve watched the film Boy Erased (2018, Joel Edgerton), some people use religion as an excuse to send off their kids to receive conversion therapy from a religious or spiritual advisor just like the main character in the movie (who happens to be a pastor’s kid, by the way). They call it conversion therapy but it’s cult-like, really. If you haven’t watched the movie yet, you really should.
Speaking of pastor’s kids, last week, an American Idol contestant named Jeremiah Lloyd Harmon auditioned with an original song titled “Almost Heaven.” Harmon—who is gay, a church janitor, and a pastor’s kid (PK)—said that the song is about “questioning if there’s a place for me and I guess people like me in heaven.”
Yet, on one hand, there are pastors like this guy who promises in this touching letter that if he has gay children, that he’ll love them.
Anyway, what do you think guys? Religion and sexuality, can we have both? Share with us your thoughts and stories in the comments section below.
Of course you can be religious and gay at the same time (because people demonstrate that), but it’s intellectually dishonest. Why should you believe anything that a religion has to say when you think they’re wrong to condemn homosexuals?
On point. I had this discussion with a religious person using the Bible saying it’s gods words. The Bible was written by man. (Correct but inspired by god, she replied). How do you know this? (Because it says so in the Bible, she replied) ……see where this goes.
The Bible is the only self-authenticating book ever written. It contains about 1,500 detailed prophecies, about 1,000 of which have been fulfilled inerrantly. Inerrantly fulfilled prophecies prove that the Bible was inspired by God. The remaining prophecies are being or will be fulfilled. A few examples: The Bible predicted the miraculous re-birth of Israel as a nation in 1948. The Bible predicted that after the Jews returned to their homeland, it would blossom. Mark Twain visited Israel around 1867 and described it as “desolate…devoid of vegetation and human population.” The Jews made the desert bloom. Israel is a world-class leader… Read more »
I am the church. I am fearfully and wonderfully made in the image of God. I love others like God loves me…Unconditionally. I live and operate in unconditional love every moment of the day because I love myself unconditionally. I am the church!
& how much of the Bible do you think ACTUALLY happened? For example – Noah & the great flood. IF the Earth was covered with water, then aren’t we all born from incest?
I could apply so-called prophesies to a myriad of situations because they are purposely vague. The little book of fairytales continues to persecute, punish and demoralize millions of people from something written by self-serving men from thousands of years ago. I know God and we are here to learn and live life to its fullest. Doing anything less is an affront to God and the universe. Now Nostrodamas predicting the rise of Hister, that’s prophecy.
Many Christian denominations accept homosexuals. Some have for over a couple of decades.
doesn’t that depend on which “religion” you are referring to – since they are NOT “all the same” in their “rules & regulations” ??? Regardless, anyone ahs the “right to choose” what’s right for them – gay or not. There is no-thing that fits every single a’genda on this God forsaken planet. So gay or otherwise, white or otherwise, Native Amer or otherwise, nude or clothed – every person can choose whatever is ‘right for them’ and not by the opinion or perception of anyone else
Acceptance of sexuality obviously depends on the “religion.” As a God lover myself, I regard even atheism as a religion, possibly a wholesome step up from the more bigoted flavors of “God-fearers.” We all exist because of God’s infinite and unconditional love, which by definition means God could hardly care less if we “believe” in God. A relationship with Divine Spirit brings many benefits, but that has to be a matter of personal discovery. This is threatening to many so-called religions of sheeple abdicating personal responsibility in favor of being told how to live.
“they” are not all correct. It is chaNGING RAPIDLY. Society does change. Several membders of every good church are GL ewtc.
Yes if you want to…….
Religion isn’t from God; it is from Man. Man created the concept of God to explain what his five senses and intellect could not. Religion, regardless, of beliefs or practice is a Myth…not unlike the Greek, Roman or Egyptian. There is not God, as such; there is only Man and Man is hos own Creator and Deliver. Read the duplicity within the Bible: only Man could write of the destruction of humanity via The Great Flood, and create the concept of The Rainbow, that the Rainbow is God’s Promise never to destroy Mankind via another flood; read the Book of… Read more »
Sexuality and Spirituality are NOT mutually exclusive. Most mainstream ‘religions’ though, are definitely exclusive of any sexuality. Mostly because ‘religion’ seeks to control people and the most powerful force driving the majority of Humankind is sex. “Religion” can’t abide that!
Spot on. Well said.
This is a very interesting article. My personal opinion as a person of faith and an openly gay black man is that we definitely can have religion, spirituality, and sexuality as members of the LGBTQ community. I don’t have an answer on religious celebration, and I do not attend church regularly myself… but we can’t give up the fight. I am acutely aware how important spiritual formation is to all people. We have assist on our right to have access to a loving religious experience.
I agree, and feel likewise. I formerly was in church every time the doors were open. Don’t attend anymore, not because GOD rejects me, but people do. I stay away, in order not to upset them and their “holier than thou” attitude. I worship GOD alone, and with a few like minded gay friends–follow no script, any time, and any place the Spirit moves–and that’s often. I like to imagine GOD smiling on friends and my frequent, impromtu praise and worship year round, pleasing The ALMIGHTY more than an hour once per week. (and after announcements, preachers’ humor, “prayers” which… Read more »
Brent, I am currently a non attending United Church of Christ Member, not to be confused with Church of Church. I am non-attending for reasons not associated with. LGBT. If you decide you want to give church again the UCC might be for you. http://www.ucc.org/lgbt I offer this just as a resource.
Spirituality and RELIGION are two of the most different issues in anyone’s life – No one has to be “religious” to be spiritually gifted, and I take a wild guess to say that ANYONE spiritual most certainly might choose NOT to be religious, not because of ‘dismissing’ a persons choice, but knowing “Spiritual Gifts” far out-weigh “religion”
I guess we can be gay and religious. Personally I believe in a “higher power” because I do not believe everything “just happened by chance” but I do not believe in organized religion.
American Protestantism is a perversion which shouldn’t be confused with Christianity. Yes, we can have both.
If you believe the bible a sin is a sin. Not one is worse than the other. The bible also tells us of love and forgiveness.
Man(the human race) would like you to think that sexuality meaning same sex relations is wrong.
God did create Adam and Eve but he also created the feeling we have.
With all the hate in the world today, we should be thankful for love that is shared.
The ALMIGHTY is my BEST FRIEND, Perfect in Love, Patience, Kindness, Faithfulness, Generosity and Goodness. GOD accepts me how I am, faults included–HE made me, so I am not ashamed! It is people, who make mere human rules, but claim their rules are “God’s.” Religious people pick and choose certain exclusions (like gays), as Taboos which are outside the power of the Blood Sacrifice of Christ. All religions are mistaken! (1.) GOD created human sexuality, a gift like our other senses to enjoy and give GOD thanks for. (2.) For argument sake, even if homosexuality is sin, the Sacrifice of… Read more »
To Brent Majors. Thanks. Well said.
P.S. Great seafaring icons have gone around the world LONG before the idiot Columbus – if you are using Columbus as an example for anything – it’s clear you have yet to uncover the most critical bits that “human (stupid) History” has put in front of you: jst a very poor choice of ‘example’ if YOU , yourself has “spoken to God” which people often do, whether they are aware or not (and often NOT 🙂 Also – just FYI – some of the greatest and incredibly ‘gifted’ physicists have proven tremendous ‘gains’ in the existence of “consciousness’ outside of… Read more »
He chose to use Christopher Columbus as an example to exalt the name of our Lord Christ Jesus. I mean the name Christopher begins with Christ. And so having Columbus (Day, a national holiday commemorating the day he arrived) in his comment was a perfect choice. [AUDIENCE CLAPPING] Let’s put Rick on a boat & WATCH him TRY to sail across the Atlantic & see who’s the idiot (probably the guy lending him the boat because we all know he don’t have one). Laugh out loud, I’m just messing with you Rick. Bringing up the God Molecule detail. Something Rick… Read more »
Impressive.
Brent….very well said. I went thru my own Homophobic period, but Jesus Christ is my Savior and Lord. I live for Him because He died for me. BillMcBride
I have always gone to church as a small boy when I went with my parents. One Sunday morning the priest stated that ( what you did, or think and believe it is true in your heart, then it is right by God, and you loved by God, cause we are all children of the lord ). So I go to church, not as often now as before, but if you feel it is right in your heart, than keep going, for me it gives me a warm heart to be able to pray and give thanks for all that… Read more »
awesome :))
Of course you can be gay and religious. Sex being “wrong” comes, at least in part, from Augustine, who after he got his “rock off” decided it was sinful.
It’s not necessarily the religion that says homosexuality is wrong, it’s those that interpret it and feed that interpretation to other people. These days, some religions marry same sex couples.
Gentlemen: “You shall not lie with a male as with a woman; it is an abomination.” Chapter 18 verse 22. “If a man lies with a male as with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination; they shall surely be put to death; their blood is upon them.” This where the fire and brimstone began! It is a much maligned quote…always taken out of contest to suite and condemn those who aspire to God…only to aspire themselves. This quote was to discourage unnecessary spillage of sperm and not be saved for productive usage. Gay sex is unproductive and… Read more »
I am an out gay happy proud partnered man who lives in San Francisco. My partner & I are Lutheran & we believe in God. We go to church regularly. But we also live full lives as gay men that are in a relationship. God bless!
Religion is the biggest scam in the world, it’s institutionalized ignorance based on superstition, lies, delusions, fairy tales. The question is, “are intelligence and religion mutually exclusive”? The answer is yes.
WELL SAID, SWEET SIMPLE STRAIGHT TO THE POINT. I JUST WISH THEY COULD HEAR… PREACH ON FRIEND!!
Religion is the biggest scam in the world. It’s institutionalized ignorance based on lies, delusions, superstitions, fairy tales and wishful thinking. The question is, “are religion and intelligence mutually exclusive?” The answer is YES.
The problem for the falsely religious and using the bible against being gay is that premarital and extra marital sex are defined as equivocal sins, all of whom should be stoned to death but the darling catholics and evangelicals cheat on their spouses and have premarital sex so they let those go and focus on gays in typical religious hypocrisy. Then came jesus son of a single mother and one of the first to not be killed in utero, this also kills the religious argument against abortion the baby was to be killed inside the mother and with the father… Read more »
I respect everyone and their beliefs as long as they keep to themselves. This is the 21 century and people still believe the magic man in the sky. Wow!!!
Perhaps you would share your superior explanation for where the universe came from, how we are to live, and where we are going? Does it go something like this?: “There used to be absolutely nothing. Then, it exploded! Explosions produce crap, but this chance explosion was unsurpassably creative! It produced all the matter, energy, laws, and designs way beyond human ingenuity (including life itself) in the universe!” “Nothing created Everything” is, in my opinion, the most unscientific, irrational, superstitious, and destructive myth of all. It makes the Bible look like the most complete, rational, comprehensive, ingenious, and proven belief system… Read more »
There definitely is a Liberal-Socialist gay agenda and on that agenda is the intolerance of religion. Religion and sexuality are not mutually exclusive.
I LOVE GOD AND HE MOST CERTAINLY LOVES ME. SO MUCH I COULD SAY ON THIS SUBJECT. SO LONG I FELT BOUNDED. BUT AFTER A MARRIAGE, KIDS AND NOW GRANDCHIDREN. IM AT PEACE AND HAPPY WITH ME. ESPECIALLY YELLING TO MY MOM AT 56 IM GAY! FIND YOUR PEACE AND BE AT PEACE.
AS FOR ME AND MY HOUSE WE SHALL PRAISE THE LORD!
I’m part of a major US religion that is accepting of LGTBQ+ persons. Its old. It’s Conservative. Whether as members or Pastors, sexuality is not an issue.
I’m part of a major US religion that is accepting of LGTBQ+ persons. Its old. It’s Conservative. Whether as members or Pastors, sexuality is not an issue. It’s left up to people and their relationship with God. Just as all other factors of life are.
I feel like religion and faith are very personal beliefs and I have issues when they want to force religion into politics. Evangelicals voted for Trump because he’s so call religious. Give me a break!
Growing up in the Midwest in the 50’s-70’s, church was part of the social fabric of the small, rural community. Many partook. Many didn’t. My family did. As I grew and tried to form myself within this community I knew I was of it, but not. No one ever told me I couldn’t do or be what I wanted. I also participated in a lot of activities (church, school, sports, music) to journey through all this growing up. I left the town I grew up in when I graduated from high school. I regularly return to visit family and friends,… Read more »
Excellent commentary, beautifully expressed.
It’s a bad question. Most branches of Abrahamic religions want to posit that homosexuality is wrong. Within other branches, it was/is a part of the community and accepted. Get away from Abrahamic religions, and you’ll find a huge diversity in thought. Is spirituality all about Christianity, Judaism, and Islam? No. Exercising sexuality has often been the criticism across the world, as well as monogamy vs polygamy vs polyamory. Relationships are tough. Praying and meditation and even yoga are all manifestations of spirituality. Where the world gets into trouble is orthodoxy– strong strict rules, the result of power and control needs.… Read more »
God sees hearts not body parts, we are neither male nor female. Jew or Greek in his sight ,we are only lights In his eyes ,that light is what you take with you when you passed from this earth.
God knew what he was getting when he chose me
IAM one w God
I wonder how the question posed digressed from Religion and sexuality,
…. and descended to “Can we be gay and spritual?”
I submit the answer is “yes” .
Of course you can be gay and religious. No matter what religion, there are more liberal interpretations of it.
In my research, it is possible to be religious and homosexual at the same time. However, depending on the religion and the person there may or may not be a contradiction involved. There are religions that have no problem with homosexuality and do not condemn it at all. If you adhere to one of these theologies then there is no issue. However if you adhere to a religion that does condemn homosexuality, then you may have an internal conflict between what you believe and who you are. This can for some, create a self-hate or loathing which is bad for… Read more »
Jesus came to redeem all from sin. His blood atones for all sin. Through faith in him we live.
I mean, there’s nothing physically stopping anyone from believing in a higher power. However, as a gay man of science and medicine, it’s a bit silly to believe in it. Man always has a need for answers and religion just fills the gap when we don’t have answers. Furthermore, it’s a bit silly to be a Gay man and believe in a Abrahamic God that , by the book, considers your lifestyle a sin. You can perform all the mental gymnastics you want but you cannot change the meaning of a rather straightforward sentence. Cherry picking makes you no better… Read more »
In the time of Moses, all civilizations endorsed homosexuality, no one had a problem with it. However, when the Hebrews left Egypt and started to wonder around the desert, they believed that they were the chosen of God, and as such had to be different. Plus during this time, Moses was trying to build an army to defeat the people that were in the land across the Jordan River which God had given to the Hebrews. If the law allowed men to lay with men and women to lay with woman, there would be a lack of children and thereby… Read more »
Religions that condemn are judging you… judging everyone. Should you not be accepted for who and what you are…for your hungers and needs. Did you choose your path or were you born as you were with your hungers and needs? Satan says… feed your hungers and needs. Accept your lust, accept your physical desires and wants. Christians love to judge, to put you in a box to keep you controlled and manipulate you. Satan says “Do As Thy Want”… He will never judge you because HE believes that we are all gods… all the masters of our own destiny. The… Read more »
True religions calls man to get better to conform to the divine..gays need to do that in their own way..and that is for sure..we all do. Forget what other people say..focus on what God says. We need Him
Doesn’t that depend on which “religion” you are referring to – since they are NOT “all the same” in their “rules & regulations” ??? Nor is “religion” and Spiritual-ness even remotely the same: true spirituality is a Gift, religion is simply culturally ‘adapted to people everywhere. Regardless, anyone has the “right to choose” what’s right for them – gay or not. There is no-thing that fits every single a’genda on this God forsaken planet. So gay or otherwise, white or otherwise, Native Amer or otherwise, nude or clothed – every person can choose whatever is ‘right for them’ and not… Read more »
As a former convert to Fundamentalist Protestantism, I can say that I entered the Faith because my father had just died, I felt traumatized, my only experiences with gay men up to that time has been largely very negative, and I didn’t want to have any sexuality at all. So I turned to the Faith in hopes of finding a strong, protective, paternalistic community which would accept me and care for me. I was willing to give up my sexuality to get that. Of course it didn’t work out the way I had hoped. I met a lot of nice… Read more »
I went to visit my brother who lives in another state. On Sunday, he, his husband, and I went to a mainline denominational church. Nearly the entire congregation were members of the LGBTQ community. It was obvious that they had found acceptance in the church and didn’t in no way found sexuality and spirituality to be in conflict.
I believe you can be both, gay and of faith. I am.
There are Christian denominations that have moved beyond mere acceptance to affirmation of all people, no matter who they love or who they are on Life’s journey. We in the UCC have done so since 1972 when we ordained the first openly gay non-celibate man to a mainline church in Christendom, William R. Johnson. Though in the minority, we are not the only ones. We’ve just been poor about getting out our message of God’s unconditional love. And it’s hard to hear it over all the messages of hate from some religious groups. CHECK OUT our UCC ad that even… Read more »
Does any of this make any sense? What is the argument? We are alive, breathe and move, so each of us decides the right and wrong as it suits us – only human nature, unique to our minds, casts shadows positive and negative. In this short space, express yourself, interact, be free without harm to anyone. SIMPLE!!!
Paul – a Jew by tradition and conditioning – speaks against homosexuality. One – possibly two of the Old Testament (Jewish) books proscribes it. NOWHERE in the gospels does Christ speak on it at all! There are a lot of professed Christians who would do well to do an in-depth study of Christ’s teachings, who haven’t, and who proclaim themselves experts on what is, and is not proscribed by Christ. It strikes me that the Jewish proscription against homosexuality reflects the cultural bias of the day – nothing more or less than that. It is unfortunate that it has been… Read more »
You may be right about “haters,” but I’ve been inclined to debate homosexuality with Christians/conservatives, civilly stating my points on sites like American Thinker. (1) Many Christians do not realize that the words “homosexual” and “homosexuality” were not invented until the late 1800’s. The Bible was largely completed by 100 A.D. The idea that the Bible could not be properly translated until new English words were invented in the late 1800’s taxes credulity. The idea that words invented in the late 1800’s even belong in a translation of the Bible is questionable. (2) Adding to the confusion is the fact… Read more »
Yes, I attend a Catholic church. I believe that accepting Jesus Christ as Lord, Savior, and Redeemer is the most important decision in life. I believe that the Bible is the only self-authenticating book ever written. I believe that God created us as sexual beings, that same-gender attraction is not a choice, and that it is irrational to demand or expect that a gay man not have a sex life. I think that anything-goes sex, I.e., meaningless sex, sex with strangers, orgies, etc. is offensive to God whether it is done by heterosexuals or by homosexuals. I think that an… Read more »
I was born and raised in church. My friends/family goes to church and pretend to be very religious. As a boy I was taught early that you must be a saved/ born again Christian to go to heaven. Saved meaning accepting Christ as your personal Saviour. Otherwise you are going to burn forever in hell no matter what. Being taught that as youngster, I watched my people cry, pray and serve the Lord with all their heart in public and in church. Behind closed doors, I watched them do everything under the sun. They are argruing, lying, mean, angry, jealous-minded,… Read more »
The problem comes in confusing the two (religion & spirituality). Sexuality may be incompatible with the former but not the latter. Religions are constructs by man and are often corrupted by those who are in power within the religion to match their goals. Perhaps at one time it was useful for religion to encourage procreation but those days are long gone. Pete Buttigieg, mayor of South Bend and democratic candidate for President, has spoken beautifully on this subject of religion & spirituality.
You can be gay and spiritual but not religious if you are bhuddist Hindu taoist confusionist wiccan or animist but Catholic. Jewish or Muslim or protestant and you are in trouble you cant be religious
While far from being an expert on the bible, rather I’m right or wrong, I far prefer to believe what I think it means then what I’ve been told it means. Fortunately, I was “blessed” to have been born into and raised in a blended religion family. So while Dad was a faithful first Southern Baptist, who according to them, God was to be feared, and along with all of the yelling and the screaming, was a weird peace within the constant promise of fire and brimstone in the knowledge that if you simply thought impure thoughts God would stike… Read more »
“Man created God in his image”, not that “God created man in God’s image”. The Bible written by man. The 10 Commandments written by man. According to Bible stories God came and talked directly to several people and then those people passed on the words (man created those words). The Bible is full of many stories that were pertinent to the times, like a magazine. You can be religious inspite of any religious teaching. They are just man’s interpretations. Make religion work for you in your life, you don’t have to live by their words. If you choose to go… Read more »
I personally think that you can have both one is having or establishing a personal relationship with your heavenly father. While being gay and liking what you like. He made us in his own image. If we were all the same and like the same you would have to say that would be pretty boring.
Most definitely! Can a heterosexual who has had sex before marriage be religious even though that’s adultery? Hope so or churches will be pretty empty. That being said there is that matter of finding the right religion or (in the case of Christianity) faith. Steer clear of the fundamentalists unless you have a sado thing against your self esteem. Above all else, remember; it’s ultimately between you and God. There will always be someone who will tell you you have got it wrong. My rule is unless they can turn water into wine and get me really drunk, what anyone… Read more »
Yes, on being gay and religious! I feel it is between your God and you on your sexual preference. I’m gay and know that the God I’ve always known loves me for who I am.
We are all sinners in differing ways, saved by His grace!
Being a member of the United Methodist Church, and all that has happened recently within, I choose to back away from attending like I used to, but worship Him daily in my walk with Him.
Some of the horniest people can be met in church.
Being religious doesn’t mean that your urge for sexual experiences goes away.
Sometimes it is enhanced due to the taboo nature of it from the standpoint of a religious setting.
Then there are also some churches and religious leaders that are accepting that sex is natural and normal in the lives of many church members, even homosexual experiences and they are ok, and accepting of that.
I was raised in the Catholic religion and I was put down by family and friends which lead me into Alcoholism and 10 years later in a meeting I heard someone say that GOD does not make JUNK. I am a religious person and a spiritual person and I am still a GAY man who goes to church and I am still sober 48 years later. I just celebrated my 82 birthday GOD still love me as he does every GAY person alive