(Photo Credits: Elquest from Shutterstock)
Size has always been one of the hottest (and most divisive) topics in gay spaces. From porn to dating apps to locker-room talk, big dicks get a lot of hype. But how many guys out there actually genuinely enjoy “massive” dongs?
One gay man online recently sparked the debate when he asked:
Most of everywhere I go, I always see just that very large group of gay guys expressing how much they love men who are absolutely hung, and I’ve never bottomed and personally don’t ever want to bottom, but at some point, doesn’t that just hurt or at least feel uncomfortable?
His question opened the floodgates to a range of perspectives, from men who can’t get enough of big ones to others who find average size much more satisfying.
Some gay men admitted that while oversized members may look good, the actual experience isn’t always as pleasurable. “Personally, I think they’re nice to look at (I mean most are), but in terms of enjoying them, I’d much rather have 5–6,” one man said. Another agreed, noting that the average size hits the sweet spot. In other words, aesthetics and practicality don’t always line up.
In addition, several men emphasized that context and mood matter as much as inches. One guy confessed, “It does feel uncomfortable, but it’s quite enjoyable too. It depends on the day and how my ass feels personally. Sometimes I don’t want to bottom but still love sucking a big dick. I’m easy, though and don’t care for just big ones. Some thicker but smaller ones are hot too.” For him, the pleasure comes not just from size but from variety, balance, and being in the right headspace.
On the other hand, some gay men admit they love the intensity only a big one can bring. “I do. They make me feel so fulfilled. But definitely have to take it slow and train up to them,” shared one respondent. Another echoed that thought, saying he loved the feeling of being completely full, describing the build-up as challenging but ultimately heavenly once his body adjusted.
Moreover, not all the fascination with size is about bottoming. Oral enthusiasts chimed in as well, pointing out that shape matters just as much as size. One man explained, “The thing is, some dicks are too thick and too straight to deepthroat successfully, so for me it’s like—can I do all my favorite most expert moves with it? Can I deepthroat it? If so, then I’m happy. Some guys are bigger but have the perfect curve to go down my throat, and the same dick size, but straight might be a problem. TLDR: very much depends on the specific meat.” For him, it wasn’t just about being big—it was about whether it worked for his body and skills.
Meanwhile, others admitted their enjoyment of massive cocks stays in the realm of fantasy. One gay man said, “I enjoy looking at them in pics and vids, and when I’ve been lucky enough to find one in the wild, I enjoy sucking them. That’s it for me, though, as I don’t enjoy bottoming for them.” Another took it even further, saying, “I LOOOOOVE huge penises BUT only for watching in porn. In real life, I want 6 or 7 inches—that’s the perfect size to fit very comfortably & feel very good in my mouth & ass.” For many, what excites in porn doesn’t always translate into what feels good in bed.
What’s clear is that size preferences vary wildly among gay men. Some crave the fullness and intensity of massive dongs, others admire them from a distance but prefer a more comfortable fit, and still others insist that shape, girth, and curve play as much of a role as inches. Moreover, even among size queens, there’s acknowledgment that handling something so big requires patience, practice, and sometimes, the right lube and toys to prepare.
So what does this all mean for the size debate? Perhaps the obsession with “massive” cocks is just one part of a much more nuanced conversation about desire, fantasy, and pleasure. Not everyone wants to ride a “monster,” and not everyone needs to. At the end of the day, whether you’re into five inches, seven inches, or double digits, the real key is honesty, communication, and taking care of your body.
Adam4Adam blog readers, what’s your take—does size matter more than connection, chemistry, or skill in bed? Do you feel more turned on by a big cock, or by a partner who knows exactly what to do with whatever they’ve got? Share your thoughts with us in the comments section down below. And no matter your answer, remember that the sexiest thing you can bring to bed is safe play.
Got a topic you’d love to see on the Adam4Adam blog? Send your ideas to [email protected] or [email protected]—we’d love to hear from you!
Size does matters but for me, it depends on the person to a certain extent. Anything less than 4 inches, I’ll pass. When a rumor is spread, that a guy has a big long dick it gets everyone attention, men and women. Not just gay men but straight men too. It’s almost like a badge of honor. If the guy is hung and attractive, it’s even more appealing. I remember the pole vaulter in the last Olympic, dick was so big, it grazed the bar during his jump and knocked it over. He made national news. I also noticed that… Read more »
yo, it ain’t length, it’s width
I asked my mom about a previous boyfriend of hers. She said it was a pony can. It was too short and too wide to satisfy.
I knew what she meant. It was about like backing up to a door knob.
Yes, we had these conversations about our lives.
yo, width rubs the vaginal walls that is wat i was sayin’
. . . You know you right, lmao, “fullness-girth” is highly desirable, regardless, but also, length, to “get all-up-in-it.”
WHO the HELL cares about “vaginal walls” here dude!?!? Are you DELUSIONAL???! LOLOLOLOL
We call short and wide cock a “chode”
yo, did some research>> “girth is generally considered more beneficial than length by most women and gay men”.
Then I’m an odball here, because I prefer length over girth anyday hunny.
Like I pointed out in my post: say he has a larger penis, but bad hygiene, very confrontational personality, etc..
Does 1 only focus on the manhood?
The subject is penis size, not personal hygiene.
The penis isn’t detachable, so it goes with the rest of the guy’s “features”.
So what you are saying,it dont matter if it nasty stinking,if its big??Personal hygiene is always first!
Some prefer it natural, while others like it freshly showered. So each to their own.
The question asked is do gay men truly love hung guys? I think most do but not all. No, I don’t think sane gay guys only focus on the manhood. You mentioned bad hygiene and personality issues. I agree those are deal breakers.
Like I just posted: you can’t detach the penis & put it on a man you wish had it (like a Mr. Potato Head). So, you have to take THE WHOLE GUY along with the penis.
The question focused on one aspect. Stop trying to add qualifiers and pay attention to detail. Thank you
But that 1 aspect is NOT something you can transfer among men. So if you’re solely focusing on that 1 area, …
that pole vaulter was most likely uncut. does that bother you like most people when they realize that ?
If he hit his knee, no one would have said a word.
He trained day after day for many many years to earn the right to compete and THIS is what he’ll be known for?
Did he get million dollar endorsement offers for the “internet sensation” he was? No.
Something’s just not right there.
The perception of the Olympics has changed over the years from spirit, participation competition and exclusivity to endorsements, woke and sensationalism so you have the bit about a pole vaulter being negatively affected by his penis not the unfortunateness of not placing because of circumstances beyond his control?
More people should be uncut!
Damn Much rather be with an uncut guy. It’s natural and how men were meant to be and should be. Hung and uncut is the the best.
Yes for me I prefer a 8” uncut cock gives me great enjoyment and satisfaction when I make a good cock cum hard down my throat. Cumguy
And true circumference does enhance the feeling hugely I like about 51/2” ? Any thoughts??
Can relate to that. I am currently dating a Guy that my Friends are all Meh, whatever and really question What is the attraction. He may not be the Pagent Winner or Best in Show by most Gay Standards but he checks a lot of boxes for Me. Nice Guy,pretty average looking, nice athletic body and a very Big Cock. I remember talking to him one Night, thought he was interesting but my Friends never expected me to ever go out with him. One thing led to another and I ended up coming over to his house for Dinner which… Read more »
I think it’s more of a personal issue; short guys wish they were taller, heavy set wish they were thinner, hair, attractiveness, confidence, etc..
It’s easy to see manhoods also being compared.
But, does only 1 element make a man? Say all he has going for him is penis size…would that make you happy?
As they say, “there can be too much of a good thing.” I’m good with guys with lengths up to about 7-1/2″ and girths less than 5″. Not being avid about anal and not being gifted with a wide throat, anything beyond those figures becomes problematic. I don’t contact “hung” guys if their being so is evident in their profiles for that reason. When I’ve been contacted by guys who are such, they’ve tended to be Dominate Tops seeking their next hole to plow. Neither of those are what I seek, so I’ll reply “thanks, but we’re not seeking the… Read more »
“Many Gay guys worship guys who are hung”
Agree!!!
This Gay guy doesn’t love or not love a Gay guy based upon his penis. Size, hung or not, by itself doesn’t make him lovable or not. Objectification over one attribute (especially a physical one none of us had a say in about receiving) does little good for all of us.
A guy is attractive or not and lovable or not based on a number of factors which will vary from guy to guy.
Spot on!
I’m a moderately well-hung (7.5 inches and thick) top man who is often complimented for my cock but personally, I like smaller cocks for giving oral sex to. I’m had 2 bouts of head and neck cancer that required a jaw reconstruction that left me unable to open very wide. I can’t fit to stacked fingers between my upper and lower teeth so I appreciate smaller cocks since they are all I can suck.
Ugggggghh……. Okay. Well sorry to be the one to have to be the bearer of bad news man, but 7.5 inches is NOT “Moderately Well Hung”. It is however Above Average to a Moderately Above Average size though. So congratulations on that. You see it has been common knowledge for some time now that the Average Straight American male is between 5 & 5.5 inches. While the Average Gay American male is between 6 & 6.5 inches. Therefore you at 7.5 would be above average for a gay man and Moderately Above average for a straight man. A TRUE “Moderately… Read more »
This isn’t really a debate. There are people that love hung guys and the rest are liars.
yo, ! ! !
I want the whole package and won’t make a decision just on the size of a guy’s cock. That said, I absolutely love a larger cock, especially width. I’m not someone who exclusively wants to fuck a guy with a big cock but if he has one … especially nice thick one, That’s an awesome bonus!.
Yes
I love a big 8″ cock, but it is nothing if attached to the wrong guy. A hung man is a turnoff if he’s arrogant, mean, unhygienic, or lacks personality. Conversely, an average sized man is a huge turn on if he has skills, fun, hygienic or easy to be with. A big cock is a plus, but not a requirement. A lot of “influencers” show off their big cock on social media, but their narcissistic ways are a complete turnoff. If he’s a kind person, yes, I will be instantly on my knees sucking that monster cock to completion.
Bigger is and will always be preferred. Isn’t it past time to retire the question of “does size matter”?
I’d say the majority of the cocks I suck are around 6-7″. On occasion, I’ve had larger and that’s of course a treat. But once in awhile I’ve gotten all intimate with a new guy, then the undies come down and OMG – this freakishly tiny one. That’s pretty off-putting. So give me at least 6″ worth to suck and I’m a happy cocksucker. But there’s another more important matter at stake here: Please maintain a hard-on! Too many get either semi-hard or remain fairly limp and that’s no fun to feel in my throat.
I am one of those guys that has 4-4.5″ with not a lot of girth. I can’t count how many times I have been really depressed and cried because I have been turned down once the undies come down. And there is not a thing I can do about it. Sometimes I can’t even get real hard because I am so conscious about it. I love a guy with lots of body hair, but mine covers up my whole dick. The best thing that I have found to appreciate is another guy with 3-5″ because I know exactly how he… Read more »
dick size is not important. i’m about 7″. I am here to tell you it does not create happiness. I fucked around plenty in my youth, and guys were happy to have sex but they were not particularly interested in a relationship. Then I found a guy who was probably closer to 5″. He was very relationship oriented and we had a wonderful relationship that lasted about 6 years. I am in a relationship again with a guy who is probably 4″ or so. He is the top because he says that my dick hurts. I am fine with it.… Read more »
Shave the pubic hair off man, or at least keep it trimmed really short. If the curtains are gone or at least short enough then it’s going to make your dick look more present, & forward, maybe even look a bit bigger especially when hard.
One of the few guys I fucked had 4.5″, but it was harder than trigonometry, fucked the cum right outta me. 10/10 would do it again.
I prefer average. 5 to 7”. Anything bigger is just too much. Especially if they like to fuck grudge match style. 5 to 6” is good for that but not bigger. I want to be able to walk out the door after we are done and after 7”, it’s just too much. Don’t get me wrong, if I hooked up with a guy that was bigger I wouldn’t turn him down, but would make sure he knew to take it easy.
And USE plenty of LUBE TOO, that always HELPS to the max 🙂
I’m literally awe-struck when watching porn and seeing some guy with a monster cock having a ball. It ends there though. I’m a bottom. A guy I was seeing for about 15 years had a modest 5 1/2 inch long by 4 1/2 inch around cock. For me, that was the perfect size for sucking and getting fucked by. This guy consistently put me over the top with anal orgasms. He knew just how to work his equipment. Unfortunately, all good things must come to an end, now, my new buddy is hung like a horse. 7 1/2 inches long… Read more »
Start doing keegles, trust me! It will help you out & get that buddy back in shape in no time because doing them tightens the pelvic floor which every human has, not just women. And attached to the male pelvic floor is the anal sphincter.
They can be nice to look at, to hold, but they’re a lot more work, and possibly a lot more pain and damage.
Not gonna lie big dicks are a major turn on for me, dont bottom much but when i have the bigger tje better
I used to think it did. But as someone with a perfectly average dick (and is a stocky, average-looking guy in his forties) who has no problem getting head pretty much whenever he wants it, I’m starting to think that dick size matters less and less – especially when a cocksucker is eager to service.
most guys say they want a big one but can’t handle a big one most are high on something if they do take it not many guys can take a big one unless they are high on something even poopers
I agree with you on them being high on something. Even in porn you see the tops and bottoms doing popper a lot.
The majority of men I have been with were in the average zone, I enjoyed every one of them. I have been with few large Mr men,I enjoyed them too I guess I just love dick.
I myself am somewhat sometimes considered a size queen. The reason I say “sometimes & somewhat” is because well in a way I’m in the odball section of the size queens, or perhaps the black sheep group of the regular size queens. That’s because while personally the absolute minimum size dick I will bottom for is 7.5 inches. Plus I absolutely love them big 8 to 10 or even 11 inch dicks with a passion. However…… I don’t care for the super thick or girthy ones. Instead I much prefer them to be an average girth dick instead of a… Read more »
I don’t look for hung guys , I’d like to play with a big cock, but I don’t want it in me.
My first lover as muscular as he was/is, had a dick like a Vienna sausage, lol, my big toe/s have more girth at 4/12inches long. But you know what, I fell in love with him, we’d been in and out of monogamous relations with each other and part; remaining friends.
I’m a grower, I like growers-surprise me! It’s really all about the person, personally, not size sense that’s not what I require.
7″ 4.5″-5″ girth is perfect
I suppose that size matters to some, and yes big ones are interesting to look at and play around with. I had my first anal orgasm from a guy that was about 5 inches. What can I say, he hit all of the right places and he knew what he was doing. Length wise anything over 8″ causes me pain if bottomed out and really thick cocks make giving oral difficult. Frankly an average sized tool that works is fine and dandy!
I have a dick fetish, I enjoy looking at dick touching them playing with them sucking them and most of all I enjoy the the feeling of a good hard dick inside me, I’m going to say it, @ 60 yrs old, most people thinks I’m in my late 40’s but that’s another story, I’ve been with a lotta men, I’m just being honest, I’m not proud of it but it is what it is, I was with a guy for 4 yrs behind my wife’s back, I read a comment at the top where the guy said it’s hard… Read more »
Big or small your choice,just be clean in/out and dont have that make you want to throw up smell to it!I believe so when you love to suck dick and balls,not so when it comes to your asshole.
I’m a top, but love bottoms with big dicks. Especially uncut. Love it when I’m on my back and he rides me and his dick flops around on me. I can either enjoy that or jerk him off until one or both of us explodes. Awesome fun!!
for me it seems that 7.5″ is the perfect size for me when i bottom. i can go for hours with total pleasure. I once had a dutch boyfriend with an 8.5″ tool that had a massive mushroom tip. when he would bang hard, his head would hit my backwall so hard that it was painful to get him off.
My cherry was taken by a 9.5″ white guy. It was not a pleasant experirnce at first, but with a combination of positioning, lube, and a third person, we made it work. On my back with legs up was the successful position & Vaseline was the only lube that would work. KY & others like it were way to thin. Yes, it was painful the whole time, but I kept at it, and met the two guys and a couple of their friends a number of times. It was always painfully, bit it like I enjoyed the pain. Still do,… Read more »
That’s is like asking a fish if it needs water.
I personally think that the bigger dicks are better to suck ..I like the throbbing and jerking as they cum
I’m not reading one thing I have experienced re: size:
Generally speaking, in my sexual situations, the larger partner most often tends to top. Anyone else?
Me being the dick loving bottom that I am, I just want a nice dick when I’m in the mood for one, witch is often, I will deal with the size when it happens, I think it’s hard for a bottom to look at a big large beautiful dick and not be interested, he is going to suck it and or at least try to take it, It’s just the gay way, Gay men love a man with a big dick,
I do not bottom. I tried it in my 20s, with both small and big dicks. They all hurt. So I never bottom. I like sucking large and small, but I prefer small to medium. I like to get the whole thing in without choking. Big cocks, require a moment of preparations. Mental that is. A small to medium allows instant deep throating. Or that most enjoyable state of just holding the cock deeply in my mouth. Nursing on it. LOL. Now, when there is a bigger than big cock, it still gets all the love it can handle. Why?… Read more »
We don’t necessarily love the hung guy… we love what he’s hung with. If he is a lousy or inconsiderate lover his 8″ dick is a waste. My favorite dick is 7″ x 5″ around. I love it! And the man behind it.
I do not consider myself a size queen except when watching porn. I love watching the bottoms taking big dicks. The biggest I have taken is about 8 to 8.5 inches. He just shoved it in and plowed away. No finesse at all in his fucking. In my life I have found that my best fucks were from guys with average size dicks. I am a total bottom but have fucked a few guys over time. My biggest thing is that the bottoms I fucked just laid there. When I bottom I work my ass muscles on the tops dick.… Read more »
I’ll admit, I am a size queen. The bigger, the better, and uncut is a huge plus. The more foreskin a guy has, the better. As a bottom, I have found that smaller guys, moreso when cut, just feel like they are poking and jabbing and it hurts, and they fuck too fast and hard to try to achieve orgasm. While it takes a while to open up for a bigger cock, once I am taking it, I am so fucking turned out and when they pull out, I instantly miss their cock and want more.
The only time it hurt not to be confused with having some pain was with small dick guys. Guys with big dicks know how to fuck, while feeling some pain with big dick guys, until I got use to them It never was hurt. I stop bottoming with dicks 5inch and less. Only had pleasure (preceded with some pain sometimes) eversince. Next I went to MOC only. They know how to Top. Whitebois lack the skills and confidence.