(Photo Credits: Dean Drobot from Shutterstock)
We’ve all been ghosted, blocked, or turned down for reasons we can’t quite understand. But sometimes, the reason is so absurd it’s funny—at least in hindsight. One gay man took to the internet to find some comic relief in the chaos of dating by asking this question, “What’s the silliest thing you have been rejected for?”
Further, he explained that he’s talking about trivial stuff. Like the time a guy rejected him for driving a Honda Accord. Or when someone said no to him because he has blue eyes. Then there was this photo where he’s standing next to a friend who happened to be smoking; a guy messaged to say he doesn’t date people who hang out with smokers. And perhaps the most personal? A rejection over having hair in his ass crack—but not on his cheeks. OP then added, “Please share your experiences I want to laugh.”
Naturally, the responses were just as hilariously bizarre as the question. Let’s dive into some of the funniest—and pettiest—rejection stories gay men had to offer.
One gay man shared, “I’m top, but I like to suck dick, the other guy was afraid that I was going to become a bottom, he blocked me afterwards.” Apparently, enjoying giving head is now seen as a gateway to bottoming? It’s baffling how fragile some people’s ideas of sexual identity really are. This guy got blocked for being too vers-curious.
Another guy said, “For not being ‘Latino enough’ lol. He expected a Maluma, and I’m more of a Pedro Pascal.” Not being the fantasy version of a celebrity? That’s next-level superficial. Pedro Pascal is a certified zaddy, though, so that guy clearly had bad taste and unrealistic expectations.
Meanwhile, someone said, “He had a dream he was going to ask out his local Starbucks barista. He thought he was prophetic or some shit.” Imagine getting dumped for someone who only exists in a dream. You didn’t lose him to another man—you lost him to REM sleep. Hard to compete with caffeine-fueled fantasy love.
In addition, another gay man replied, “A guy stopped dating me because I needed to spend ONE weekend working on a group project in college. He didn’t care that I was an engineering student….”
God forbid you have ambition and deadlines. Rejected for prioritizing your future? That’s not a red flag—it’s a full crimson banner.
Moreover, someone revealed, “For being an ex-smoker. As in he didn’t approve of smoking and the mere fact that I smoked for a few years back in the day was a line for him.”
You’d think quitting smoking would earn points, but apparently even past choices are disqualifiers for some people.
Furthermore, someone confessed that he: “Got rejected for being too ‘country.’ Didn’t like my accent, said I would probably change my mind about being gay one day.”
Homophobia wrapped in classism and stereotyping. Rejection might’ve stung for a second, but bullet dodged—he clearly had more issues than Vogue.
Meantime, a guy confessed, “I don’t have an arch in my feet, so I got these flat ass duck fin type feet. I’ve been rejected for that.” First of all, props for the self-aware humor. But seriously—if flat feet are a dealbreaker, maybe the problem is that guy’s soul, not your soles.
Then there’s this guy who shared he got rejected for: “Mansplaining – He didn’t like me answering a question in fine technical detail, I can’t help it being an engineer. It pisses off my current boyfriend too TBH.” There’s a difference between being a know-it-all and just, well, knowing stuff. Sometimes intelligence gets misread as arrogance—especially if someone else feels insecure.
Lastly, a gay man said he was rejected for: “Being hairy and Asian… The guy straight up said Asians don’t have hair everywhere….” This one’s got racism, body shaming, and ignorance all rolled into one. Being a living contradiction to someone’s fetishized stereotype is not a crime—and you’re better off without that nonsense.
Having said all that, what about you, Adam4Adam blog readers? What’s the pettiest reason you’ve been turned down? Whether it’s your car, your body hair, or your dreams (literally), some rejections are so ridiculous they’re comedy gold. Got a story that’s even more absurd? Share it in the comments section down below—we could all use a laugh and a reminder that the right guy will never be scared off by your foot arch or lack of it or the kind of car you drive.
A guy from a few hundred miles away hit me up on A4A. No profile picture and only a half dozen of the lines were filled in. I usually just ignore these guys, but figured I’d be polite and replied “thanks for hitting me up. Please read my profile. Good luck with your searching.”
Seems once he read I wanted to stay local and preferred profiles with information in them, that was grounds for his blocking me. Will stick with ignoring them going forward.
I was once rejected by a weirdo because I told him that I don’t care about Walmart stores causing Mom and Pop stores to shut down.
covid-19 did it even better!
Not sure that’s petty. Yours is sort of a shitty take, honestly.
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Still learning how to use the site, are we?
Gay men create reasons when they have no experience dating and don’t know how to deal with the anxiety, confusion and potential rejection. So they reject first rather than be rejected. In truth neither of you can affect or effect a large corporation like Wal-Mart, consumers and the effect that has on smaller businesses—yet he made that a point of missing out on your goodness. HE was afraid… of a great many things that have nothing to do with capitalism.
An excuse? He just ghosted, that’s all. Who dates anymore?
I date. I regularly ask men out and I pay. How else to meet, romance and develop something? Men who don’t actively date/hunt often buy a lot of lottery tickets too… while sitting at home alone, online. lol… waiting for Mr. Perfect to psychically spot them and stop his car and dive through their window.
His wife is having a baby! But hes on Adam all the time
It’s shocking that some men who are married to, or date, women have sex with other men. Some of these guys are fathers, too! Really, “The Community” should outlaw such atrocious behavior and ban men who do it from having sex with other men!
Wow, I sure hope that you’re just being sarcastic.
Me & a guy planned to meet up 1 Saturday morning. He lived ~1 hr. away. I texted him when I left my apt.. I texted him when I got to the city he lived in. I texted him when I pulled in his apt. complex. I went to his apt., knocked on the door, & he said “Sorry, I’m about to go to the gym.” I just said “okay”, turned around, & went home. There was no excuse for him…ESPECIALLY since I had communicated with him just over 1 hour earlier. Part of me wondered about this since he… Read more »
Don’t feel bad, I had the same thing happen to me after driving an hour. So disappointing.
He looked through the peephole. ijs
overheard one guy say to another guy “all you can give me is sex, the other guy can give me every thing else”. the one guy left with the other guy while the other guy just stood in disbelief… .
Now I’m curious as to what “everything else” meant: love, compassion, caring, etc…….or just $?
possessions of all kinds, house, car, vacations, food, alcohol
Gay men don’t realize that pre-gay marriage, engaging with a man was sort of like finding a matching sock, or an approximate. Now, if all a gay man offers is sex—pfffft!—a man can offer a ring, children, stability, resources (yes, money and property—that’s part of what a man-partner brings to a relationship/marriage, a business, family acceptance, social acceptance, long-term care, healthcare partnership, health insurance, the 1400+ rights one gets with being a married spouse in the US and with the right husband we can hire a perfect bodied, pretty, handsome, pliable and flexible escort for the night on both of… Read more »
I have to laugh when I think of this but damned glad it happened. When it comes to dating with respect to finding a life partner, I am very picky. Met this dude, incredible mutual attraction, we flirted during the years. I asked him if I asked him out on a date would he go out with me, and he said no, that we are too much alike and would probably end up hating one another. The response surprised me, but it said more about him and his comfort in his own space than anything about me. He then said… Read more »
fabulous!
When you plan to tell a story about someone else’s pettiness, but end up telling one another your own instead.
I bet you are popular!
he isn’t but he’s the last to know?
I bet I get more ass and am invited to more parties than you were ever.
I am. I owe it to the fact that I’m not petty like you.
That’s like the guys who make all sorts of rules, boundaries, like a woman, which just keep everyone away. Nothing like presenting too much of a challenge.
There are no petty excuses when it comes to attraction. You don’t need to tell me anything other than “I’m not interested.” I’m not your boss, I don’t pay your bills, you don’t answer to me. If you’re not attracted to me, we can both go on our merry way with no resentment or need for explanation.
After chatting with a guy online (may have been on A4A), dude said he didn’t want to meet because he prefers masculine men. I said I am masculine. He said my pics showed I pluck my eyebrows (which they didn’t, but that didn’t stop him). I said I don’t pluck my eyebrows. He insisted, based on my pics, having never met me in person, that I did and he told me not to contact him again. No problem! smh
The faceless guys on A4A are the WORST guys to chat with! I’ve been on A4A for 29 years and have NEVER initiated contacting a ghost…However, when they contact me, as they still do, I look at their profile page to see what they may be or are seeking from me. If I’m not interested in the person, then, I thank them for peeping my profile page–denoting that I’m not interested. MOST of them curse me out or name call me while cursing me out and then block me. I stopped thinking that I must’ve raped their mother in church… Read more »
I don’t have public face pics because we’re surrounded by cyber criminals who steal identities and use your pics to scam people
A4a has been around for 29 years???
Sorry, but “I’ve been on A4A for 29 years”?
I thought this site was created 20teens earliest.
2003.
I always associate those with no pix as spambots/fake profiles.
That &/or the profile MAY have 3 (@ MOST) details listed.
It’s only been around since 2003. It’s 22 years old.
My cock was too pale!
30 min drive was too much!
I don’t act like a gay man!
you do have Adam4Adam!
I think my rejections have been honest. “This isn’t going to work.” Haha.
Well, best to not start anything to end soon thereafter.
Company I worked for just had a lay off and I was one of the 20% or so that was let go. First time I was out of work since a teenager. Anyway, went on a date with a guy who was like 5 years older than me. While talking about what he did and all pretty obvious that he was in a lower paying job. When he asked what I did said I was just laid off and not sure what I was going to do next. He said he didn’t date guys who couldn’t hold a job. 2… Read more »
Said he didn’t want a relationship; we dated for a few months. Friends, I thought. No sex. One night out for dinner, he reiterates he doesn’t want a relationship. I’m like, shrug, Okay. I was already seeing a handful of guys on rotation. Has a big party for his birthday one summer, I bring gifts and several friends. I think he assumed I was dating one of my handsome friends—tells me at end of party that my friend wasn’t good enough for me”. I had no idea what he was talking about. Calls me a week later, angry that I… Read more »
Said I was to old and another Said oh you have a beard like what does any of that have to do with having sex with some i don’t care about those things that would be like me saying oh you are only 20 well your to young or oh you don’t have a beard no thanks I understand people like what they like but that’s not reel reason to ghost or not hookup with them
I was rejected because I was white — in reality I’m a mixed guy with bronze/caramel colored skin although when lights hit skin as appeared in a pic I sent. I looked lighter than usual. Before I could respond I was blocked lmao
I was chatting with a guy on A4A. We unlocked our pics. He said I was hot and he wanted to have sex with me. He asked my age. I told him. He replied, “we’re not a match, I’m not attracted to men with long hair.” My hair wasn’t very long, it didn’t even cover my ears. He also, of course, saw how long my hair was before he said I was hot and he wanted to have sex with me. Hilarious.
I’m an older guy…slim and fit. He had seen my body picture…but upon meeting he said that he was looking for a higher BMI. lol…lol.
Had been chatting with this guy on A4A for sometime, finally agreed to meet up. When we got naked he said l don’t do uncut cock. Very strange seeing my profile states that I am uncut and pics in profile clearly show that l am uncut.
Musta been your toenails
He said that in general, “he’s not honest enough for me,” I agreed with him.