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If so, what was it like? Was it for you? Would you go into one again?
We are asking because entering unfamiliar territory is rarely seamless—especially when it is a gay orgy. Recently, a 32-year‑old gay man shared a vulnerable first‑time experience, he said: “Went to my first gay orgy last night without knowing anyone else there.” Further, he recounted:
“It was fit/in shape guys only, ages 18‑40. It started as an underwear party with drinking games. I had fun with that part since I got to do a shot from a stranger’s lap successfully without spilling anything.” That playful vibe kept things light, with about 15 guys in attendance. But once the upstairs sex portion began, he realized he “didn’t really vibe with anyone.” So instead of forcing participation, he quietly watched for about 20 minutes before choosing to leave sober and self‑aware.
The next morning he thanked the host, clarified that he might return someday—but only when the vibes felt right. “It’s not that I wasn’t turned on, I was, I just felt something in my gut telling me that tonight wasn’t the night for me.” A host confirmed it was an unusual crowd and that everyone had fun, but respected his decision.
Anyway, some commenters reminded the original poster (OP) that not every guy is cut out for jumping into gay orgies cold. “Some guys can’t just ‘jump in’. You need attention, warming up, feeling safe, etc.”
Others emphasized gut feeling and intuition. One wrote, “Sex is all about vibing—you didn’t, nothing wrong with that.” While another guy chimed in: “Trust those gut instincts. Don’t question it. Just trust.” And some shared that even with careful planning, sometimes the energy is off. A commenter admitted, “I have a foursome planned… but be honest… I don’t wanna.” You don’t owe anyone your body—no matter what you agreed to yesterday. This means you can choose to back out. You’re allowed. Also, remember that lube, condoms, and communication aren’t just for pleasure—they’re part of safer play. Especially in group settings, STI risk multiplies fast.
Having said all that—what about you—Adam4Adam blog readers, have you ever attended a gay orgy? How was your first experience, would you say it was thrilling, awkward, liberating, or a mix of everything? Did you follow through or bail early? What lessons did you take away from your experience?
Maybe you’ve developed go‑to strategies: vetting group settings in advance, chatting privately before diving in, or choosing venues with trusted hosts. What advice would you offer someone curious but nervous?
How about the vibe factor—how do you know it’s right or wrong for you? Would you ever return after not clicking the first time?
Adam4Adam blog readers— got a story to tell? Whether you joined the orgy or chose not to, your experience matters. Share how you prepared, what you learned, or what you’d do differently next time. Someone out there could really use your insight. Comment below!
“Orgy” … “oh, how how cute!. How fun! How Gay!” Actually, silly, so “no thanks”. Go to a group party as a stranger on your own? No. Never. Went to several group parties hosted by two separate guys pre-COVID. The hosts vetted everyone who attended. No strangers. Events were by invitation only. Either the host knew long-timers who were invited or a long-time attendee “nominated” a new attendee who the host would invite once the new person passed the checks. The long-time attendees’ reputation being on the line, of course. No weirdos. No remaining clothed. No guys who just wanted… Read more »
I’ve been to several. The one that sticks out most is this ongoing thing in NYC where you drop $30 at the door, strip and just roam around looking for someone to fuck. I was verrrry cautious and only let a few guys suck me, nothing further. And there was way too much BB fucking going on for my comfort level. On the other hand, I’ve done a number of groups of 3 to 7 guys in the past and had a better chance to vet those guys out beforehand and felt safer.
Orgy or Group Sex?
Did a hot 22 man orgy in the basement of an unoccupied house. the host was a realtor and had this place on the market to rent. it was kinda intimadating at first. we all arrived in clumps and went down to the basement, they had a small room to undress and keep our clothes. then the main area was almost pitch black. could not see anything at first. had to feel around, which helped find hard cocks. first one i grabbed was nice sized feeling so i dropped to my knees and sucked it. suddenly had 2 more cocks… Read more »
Damn that must have been HOT
No. I’m a 1-on-1 type of guy.
Shocking you would even bring this up. This is how AIDS became an epidemic. Orgies are totally unsafe. And not natural at all. The only possible group activity could be masturbation and frottage/humping. Eroding normal boundaries is unhealthy.
And we stanched the epidemic with good research, medication, and PrEP/DoxyPEP. You can still be a fool and get HIV, but it gets tougher and tougher to do. It’s OK to be you, but others are not like you. Today, we’re winning the battle and having fun, too.
I’ve actually been to 2. Both experiences were “all of the above”. Both were in private homes with a large group of invited guests. Almost immediately, one young guy led me to a bedroom where we kissed, but I wasn’t ready to take it further. I was sorry that I lost track of him after that. Another guy-older than me was getting pretty aggressive and I had to shut that down. After that, I got into the vibe with other guys & ended up having a great time, playing as a group.
I started an orgy at the Midtowne spa once. I’m a big guy with a thick ass. I walked down an hall thru a group of guys while dropping my towel. I walked into a lounge and a group of black guys followed me into the room. Needless to say, I got fucked by six guys, it was amazing!
Never been to a gay orgy but would like to see what it’s like. Maybe watch. If I knew the guys maybe join in. Really want to see how it is though. I’ve fantasized about threesomes and foursomes, but would be interested with the right guys. Always had that fantasy about a couple of guys taking turns with me which would be hot. Maybe someday a gay couple will reach out and see what happens. I just think I’m scared of catching something but would feel more comfortable if everyone had a recent test. Oh, well. A guy can always… Read more »
Per my screen name here, I’ve done a number of these, but there’s a trick to it if you’re as paranoid as you sound like you are – and I am too: Just take it all in. Watch the others in action. Maybe hold a cock, kiss a guy or let a guy suck you, but don’t do more than that. It’s almost like being in a real-life porno and will give you a very good idea of what it’s like without doing anything unsafe.
Been to one with seven guys what a great time but that was a while ago tried to get one together but it is hard to find guys that are serious in meeting
Like many guys, it just kind of happened when I was cruising. 5 guys in the handicapped stall for about a half hour. Basement of the old library when I was in college. Building was in transition. Almost empty after lunch.
As for sex parties falling off since Covid? Must not have been on Sniffies yet. Groups & pump & dumps at no tell motels have never been more popular.
This is one of these things were I’ll watch but not participate in myself…