Sex: What’s So Great About Topping?

(Photo Credits: VladOrlov from Shutterstock)

Anal sex: some gay men love it, some hate it, but few talk about it quite like tops do. Recently, a gay man took to an online forum with a bold question: “Top gays why do you like anal sex so much? Describe the feeling to me in detail, please.”

So, why do tops love it so much? What really keeps them coming back for more? As it turns out, it’s not just about physical sensation, but also about intimacy, bonding, and connection.

One man explained beautifully that, “When I am inside a man, I like to feel the warmth and feel I am part of him. Really turns me on. Now if I am inside him and hurting him, I go soft and can’t get a boner.” For him and many other tops, it’s not simply about the thrusting — it’s about that deep sense of closeness, of literally being “inside” someone in a way that feels profoundly unifying.

Another top said he loves the mix of sensations and sounds: “Tight, and their moan, bottom moans are the cutest. Weirdly enough, the closeness, male bonding to the max.” It’s an intimate experience that goes beyond just physical pleasure — it’s about the little details: the squeeze, the warmth, the shared noises that can’t really be faked.

Of course, for many tops, the physical thrill is front and center. As one gay man described it: “It feels good to pump my load inside someone. The warmth I feel when I put it in and the way I get squeezed when I’m topping someone makes me feel ecstatic.” It’s the combination of tightness, warmth, and release that drives the pleasure home.

But not every top is wild about anal, which might surprise some. One honest commenter said, “Personally I’m a top but I heavily prefer oral to anal. I can’t really stay hard during anal, and I don’t have as much sensation during anal as I do for oral.” For some guys, it’s just not as physically stimulating as other forms of sex, and that’s perfectly valid too.

Then there are tops who say they genuinely need the act to reach climax. One man shared: “I genuinely cannot cum unless I fuck. Blowjobs are nice but I can’t cum from them.” For him, anal is not optional — it’s the only way to hit that final release.

So, is it the tightness, the warmth, the moans, or the primal intimacy that keeps tops coming back? Maybe it’s all of the above. For many, topping is not just a position — it’s a deeply satisfying act that makes them feel more masculine, more alive, and more connected with their partner.

What about you, Adam4Adam blog readers? If you’re a top, do these answers match your experience? If you’re a bottom, do you love knowing what goes on in a top’s mind when he’s inside you? Drop a comment and share your thoughts and stories in the comments section below — what makes anal sex worth it for you, or not?

Lastly, we’d also love to hear from you too — what topics do you want us to explore next here on the Adam4Adam blog? Is there a question, confession, or experience you think our community should talk about? Post your ideas in the comments or feel free to email us at [email protected] or at [email protected] — your stories and curiosity keep this space real, raw, and always worth reading.