(Photo Credits: VladOrlov from Shutterstock)
We all have our personal turn-offs — those little things that can make us instantly lose interest, no matter how attractive someone might be. It could be something as simple as a bad habit or an off-putting personality trait. So, we’re asking you, what small thing turns you off from someone that you just can’t overlook?
On Reddit’s r/askgaybros, some popular responses highlight that it’s not always about looks or physical features, but often about behaviors or habits that are hard to ignore. One user shared, “Snobbery. Doesn’t matter if you’re a gym bunny, twink, bear, chub, otter. To me or anyone else, arrogance is a huge turn-off.” It seems that no one likes someone who acts like they’re better than everyone else, no matter what their body type is or how fit they are.
Another common dealbreaker? Hygiene, specifically when it comes to nails. “Unkempt long fingernails on hands or feet,” one gay man commented. You’d be surprised how quickly a small detail like this can make someone pull back. Cigarette smoking also ranked high on the list of turn-offs and was mentioned by a many people as something that they just couldn’t get past.
Some turn-offs go beyond physical habits and get into personality traits. Vanity, for example, came up as a major dealbreaker. “There’s a difference between being well-groomed and needing to be perceived as good-looking at all times,” said one user. It’s one thing to take care of yourself, but another to constantly need validation about how you look.
Unreliability also made the list: “Even when a guy would ditch other plans in order to see me, it would turn me off completely. I hate that behavior.” Being unreliable, even in the name of romantic spontaneity, can be a major red flag for many people.
And, of course, no one likes someone who is just plain rude. “Treating other human beings poorly — whether it’s waitstaff or homeless,” is a huge no-go for many. How someone treats those around them says a lot about their character.
Lastly, bad smells can be a dealbreaker. We all have our scent preferences, but a bad odor can be something that turns you off immediately.
So, Adam4Adam readers, we’re curious — what small thing can turn you off of someone that you just can’t look past? Let us know your thoughts and stories in the comments section below!
Firstly, I think all of the illustrations pointed out in the blog subject aren’t small things. My personal thing is I can’t stand rude, arrogant people. Huge turnoff. I will put you in your place and then I’m out. Secondly it’s body odor but that can be easily fixed so that’s no big deal at all for me.
I couldn’t agree more. The guy might have the body of an Adonis or the Dick of Death (and KNOW it), BUT, be SOOOOO full of himself and unkind to me and others … honey, take your ass somewhere else as far away from me as possible. Hygiene is easily taken care of. Besides, shower sex is often fun and exciting.
It isn’t just one little thing; It is a lot of little things that all add up to one big thing?
I still love pussy I still love women, so my dick belongs to my wife/women, but on the other hand, I and a Closet bottom/bitch, when I’m with a man I like to be the one that is sucking dick and or getting fucked,, I don’t have a desire to top or have my dick sucked by a guy, and I let them know this up front, so it’s big turn off when a top ask me to suck my dick or if I’d fuck him, I don’t like guy’s touching my dick, especially when I’ve made it clear from… Read more »
THIS STUPID….AND TIRED ASS TROPE OF COMING TO GAY SITES……
AND TALK ABOUT HOW YOU “LOVE PUSSY” ETC…….
THEN GET THE HELL OF GAY SITES AND SPACES THEN GO CHASE IT!……
IT SHOWS THERE IS SOMETHING PSYCHOLOGICALLY WRONG WITH YOU COMING TO GAY SITES TO TALK ABOUT HOW YOU “LOVE PUSSY”……………….
It’s crazy that a person would get upset at a person because they love what they love and letting it be known that I enjoy the best of both worlds, it’s people in this world that don’t approve of women making decisions about their own bodies witch is unbelievable and down right ignorant, now a person can’t state what they like, love and dislike without someone panties getting in a bunch ? Some people in this world is totally sickening,
It’s totally out of place. He is right.
Girl you sound batshit crazy lol
Do what you do and like and be happy” and let someone else be happy with what they enjoy and dislike”
Well your comment trips us out. It’s just like “Don’t kiss me, I’m Str8,but I’ll have gay sex with you”. uhh.. How does that sound like?… How distorted sounding is that?
Maybe I worded it wrong or it was taken the wrong way,, I was saying yes I’m bi/gay , I still love women and pussy,,and yes I have excepted the fact that I am bi/gay , but when I’m with men I don’t like for men to touch or suck my dick because it a turn off to me,,so I was saying I use my dick for women , not men, my ass and mouth are for men to use , some tops try to suck my dick even after I’ve told them I’m not in to that or want… Read more »
You shouldn’t have to defend yourself but gay guys get opinionated discussing things,; especially sex. If you are going to use strong wording, the chances are people will respond in kind. I can see how you worded it wrong but at the same time, that’s what we are reading. It sounds like you are roaring at us tops, which gives me a ‘fuck yourself then’, approach and attitude. It is what it is.
I’m usually top and if there is one thing that will make me lose my boner or leave the bar to get away from the guy…it’s a bitchy and self centered attitude.
After noticing each other on a physical basis, it would definitely be about ‘good’ character or lack of it, ’cause ‘we’ can change the other things. As long as, there’s good character first.
We can help each other, make small changes to each other, as needed. It’s called making “compromises.” That said, there shouldn’t be too many, ’cause if there is, then ‘we’ should probably move on.
It is definitely a lack of good hygiene! I love freshly showered partners!!!
screeching about Trump
You beat me too it. Met a guy who was in a bad place in life. He had a lot of things going on. Many support systems got cut back by you know who. His family liked Trump. But when he got off drugs he realized Trump was a bad choice. I was proud of him and some feelings grew. But now, on his feet again, he is no longer humble, always wants to be right, and insists Trump was good all along. Any feeling I had about his progress is turning to dust. Arrogance and Trump are a combination… Read more »
Thanks for hijacking my comment for an anti-Trump rant
So you have a pussy and like to have it grabbed? Got it.
I respect everyone’s right to their political stances. While I have my own, I do not force open debates with others. And I will spend no time with someone who rants without end about how much they hate my candidates and political stance while offering nothing of positive substance about their candidates or their Party’s platform.
A guy’s political views are not a turnoff or a deal breaker. His being forceful, oppressive, and disrespectful to others who do not lockstep with his views is.
“chump is chump” (Damnatio Memoriae)… There’s no ‘reconciling’ someone’s support of today’s Hitler… I ask, “would you have killed Hitler”? Signed U.S. #Veteran (Honorably for chumpeteers)
Some would ask “who would support someone with no grasp on basic economics (increased demand increases prices that would drive companies out of business and the economy for all into a major recession)”? Someone who has not told the truth about her gun ownership, who stated during the debate no US military has died in action this year (wrong), who has not taken responsibility for reducing the flow of drugs and criminals across our borders, who has admitted she has not spoken to our biggest global foes, who supports pouring weapons into two conflicts resulting in increasing deaths of innocents”?… Read more »
What makes me so freaking mad about your response is that you didn’t critique Trump and Harris equally being you’re not for either. You wrote about 7 paragraphs trashing her and only a few words about Trump saying he has numerous issues!!! Give me a freaking break. Numerous issues!!! really?? 34 convictions, led a fucking insurrection, a felon, racist, fraudster, sex abuser, liar, paid a porn star, committed adultery, fucked up covid. Lot of closeted Trumper are too embarrassed to admit to being a supporter and that is cowardice.
I really do not understand either, like, WTF happened to their; dare I say minds?
I mean, shit, man, if it wasn’t for democracy, in this country, we wouldn’t be as wealthy a country, but a third world country instead, which it’s becoming anyway, irony for you.
And that, is on both parties, actually. But I have no choice but to vote for Kamala, it’s not even ‘entirely’ about the possible history being made.
It’s about NOT returning to an earlier dark history.
Eat a frag for your support of a traitor! SOB ‘Chump’ couldn’t wait to pull the trigger on getting American soldiers killed… His 1st week, he ordered military action that resulted in the death of #RyanOwens.
Served as what? Fluff in a military fetish video?
He didn’t deny it. Harris did during the Debate trying to show Biden was on top of Peace. Fact checking showed she lied.
Hopefully after 5 decades of voting, I can change your mind about not voting. You took time and did your research telling us why you’re against Harris. You proof- read and edit your response as needed. Please Google project-25 as it pertains to the LBGTQ community that you was born into. Project-25 is a blue print for the next conservatiive President. MAGA is all about going back to when openly gays wasn’t allowed in the military. Gays couldn’t marry who they loved. MAGA is when straight men marry women and had kids. Vance is telling us that. Gays guys cannot… Read more »
Awe, man, these people belong to a fuckin cult, not America, don’t even waste your time, ’cause a cup that is already full (of shit) cannot be filled.
You’re right. If I can get a few younger guys on here who want a change from all the chaos and vote for Harris, then my job is done. We need all the votes we can get.
I don’t vote for fish, I wrap it
. . . That was dumb comment, for a supposed, alleged adult. She a human being.
I don’t vote for orange man!!! He farts and stinks. FACTS
Trump has made it clear that Project 2025 is far too Right and represents only a portion if his plans. Abortion is not in them. He believes the People need to grapple that complex issue at the State level, not his, not Congress’, not at the Supreme Court as US laws dictate. Although “The Community” is shaking in its panties, there are no plans to change laws there. Improving Global Peace and rebuilding the economy will consume his time. But the Left doesn’t hear any of this. They believe a President with little experience with diplomacy or economics, and no… Read more »
Trump made it clear and you believe him? I can give you a good deal on Central Park. I own it and looking for a buyer.
That’s what you and others say, yet she’s not in debt/not being sued by anyone like trump either though; she not guilty of 34 counts of crime either, additionally she’s not a raving narcissistic asshole either. Lastly, she doesn’t shit on herself either, lmao! Many of ‘us’ myself included, progressed beyond, what was/is typically-traditionally “black jobs.” “2025” isn’t very appealing either, just sayin’, unless of course, if you’re raving fuckin nazi-white nationalist. I just wonder, what a highly educated, upper-middle-class Caucasian woman, would feel like, being reduced to near if not second-class citizenry. No control over your own fucking body,… Read more »
Mindless repetition of any kind of political slogan, particularly anti-Semitic ones.
Thank you Father Shlomo
“Repetition,” good word for the ignorance evil, we once again, find ourselves dealing with like broken record; those that hate themselves hate everyone else, too, just sayin’.
I’m not VOTING for either one of those totally unfit candidates and I will vote LIBERTARIAN again like I did in 2020. But the Democrats are SURE trying to use scare tactics and Gaslighting to get their DEI VP elected! The WORST administration in the HISTORY of the USA in NO WAY deserves 4 more years. And the ONLY reason SHE was chosen for VP is because of her RACE and SEX ORGANS!! The losers that try to scare the LGBTQ community into believeing we’ll ALL be required to wear PINK TRIANGLES if the Orange Fool wins are totally delusional… Read more »
Beyond the initial attractants of good hygiene and a well kept appearance would be followed by being well spoken and a good listener. INSTANT turn offs are “nelly” affectations, including references to their “pussy” or “bussy,” excessive fragrances (some of us are actually allergic to certain perfumes) when good old soap and water smell great, and general flamboyance. One doesn’t have to be the Marlboro Man but leaving a glitter trail in your wake is an instant no in my book.
Sorry, sexy talk and pet names are automatic turn offs for me. I enjoy men! I don’t enjoy Imitating the cute, sweet nothings of flirty females, especially in bed. Just my opinion, but why do people insist on conversation during sex?
Smelling a rank ass when sucking dick.
i tiny dick
Lucky you the one you were born with was not tiny.
I am a mature bi man that has enjoyed the company of men for 25 years after being curious for 20 years. Yes hygiene, rudeness, a surprise 3rd person, and a guy getting rough have all made me quickly exit. But a weird situation I have unfortunately run into 4 times is a hoarder. I don’t know if it’s just my bad luck or a trend in the community, but they were awful. I am far from a clean freak but they were a big turn off. Two of these guys were gorgeous beautiful men I wanted badly. They all… Read more »
I have and I agree with you 100%. The last one; when the front door opened I saw a pathway down the hall through piles and boxes of “stuff”. The smell of dog urine and the sound of yappings small dogs in a closed off room. I told him “this is not gonna work” and bailed.
Hygiene… let me tell you if you have BO I am turned off and hard to get turned on if we meet and you smell like cheetos and breath smell like you just woke up…. also weed breath is not hygienic, it stinks!
A crappy personality and or poor hygiene, (bad breath or body odor). Either one is a deal breaker.
Would incontinence be another deal breaker?
Mulatto no; Zebra yes
Well I have 2 things that can kill it. 1. Tatoos (1 or 2 are fine depending on what they are.) 2. Smoking of any kind i.e. tobacco, 420 AND VAPE. Sorry guys
Ditto… I’m not a fan of tattoos OR mutilations Guys wearing nose rings are especially offensive looking to me… I immediately think “Pig” and I can’t look the guy in his eyes… Ewwwwwww
Mulatto no; Zebra yes
I’ll skip the physical aspects that can turn me off and offer up one thing that is just as superficial.
Years ago I dated a guy who I learned was a vegetarian/vegan. Basically he doesn’t eat meat. Since I love to eat all kinds of food and wanted a BF/partner who would enjoy food with me, I decided he wasn’t going to work out at all. So we went out to dinner once and that was it for me. His cum also tasted awful, even though his cock was one of the best.
Bad breath
A small thing that turns me off right away, feminine underwear or anything feminine to be honest.
Body piercings.
Completely shaved bodies…natural smoothness is OK but when it comes to the nether-regions, I don’t want to feel like I’m playing with a small prepubescent child….YUK!
I am very well endowed; ten thick inches. Over a decade ago, I realized that I was wasting condoms and lube since 85% of my lovers couldn’t ‘complete’ matters. Almost as bad is the fact that so few know how to properly prepare their rectums. I pivoted to receptive head only and not fucking ANYONE upon our initial meeting; works like a charm. Absolutely nothing turns me off quicker than a bold dude who is determined for me to fuck them. I met a dude who is a toe-curlingly awesome cocksucker two weeks ago. Today I had to banish him… Read more »
Him using the n word or making a racist comment. It happened less than 48 hours ago. It totally killed the mood, I backed off and went home alone.
Man buns and nose rings. Instant boner killers for me.
referring to me as a mulatto
Instead “bi-racial.” I too, hate it, I first heard it when I came to So, Flo., these Cuban people, they’re a real turn off here, as someone born, raised and educated, in the northern states, they’re so fuckin’ antiquated.
They deny their African heritage, which I find really cowardly of them; being in permanent state of psychosis, everybody knows already their admixtures.
Color does matter, whether in 1964 or 2024. those who deny it are uncomfortable with it; those who affirm it, are into it.
That’s exactly, my point; of which those that are in denial of, on the other hand, then there’s those are actually starting to embrace, fully, mind you, all of whom they are.
You know, it’s not like Lena Horne and others who had to hide their blackness, for their careers; later to reveal their full ethnic identities . . . it’s a sacrifice, but I get it, just long as a person sooner or later . . .
But this is the insidious poison of fear/hate psychologically of oneself indoctrinated, about the idea of whiteness/ or lack thereof.
BO
Any sort of body shaving or trimming. If I want a totally smooth body, I already have my wife’s. Yeah yeah, I know I’m in the minority on this.
A little dick
A high-pitched squeaky voice is one thing, but the real killer is bad breath. Then there’s foreskin.
Discovering someone is Mother Hennepin.
Underrated comment.
A guy that has any type of addiction. Smoking, Alcohol, drugs or gambling.