(Photo Credits: VladOrlov from Shutterstock)
Have you ever thought you were straight until something—or someone—came along and made you question everything? It’s a moment that many have experienced, often leading to a deeper understanding of their true selves. If you’ve had a similar experience, we’d love to hear your story. Share with us in the comments section down below how you discovered your true sexual orientation and when exactly you realized you weren’t as straight as you once believed.
Anyway, we’re bringing this up because of a compelling story shared on Reddit by a 26-year-old guy that has sparked discussions about late-in-life realizations of sexual orientation. The OP (original poster) had always identified as straight, although he confessed that he didn’t “think I was ever properly attracted to women how a straight guy should be.” Nevertheless, he never once thought he was gay either. However, his perspective shifted dramatically after an intimate encounter with a regular customer—at the bar where he worked at as a bartender—and who had become a close friend of his over time. This unexpected experience led him to question his sexuality for the first time, opening the door to a deeper understanding of his desires.
His story is a powerful example of how one experience can upend years of self-perception. His account on Reddit revealed how this encounter was not just a physical experience, but an emotional one that challenged his long-held beliefs. He found himself reevaluating what he had always thought about his orientation, realizing that he might be attracted to men and might not be as straight as he originally thought.
This story reflects a broader phenomenon where individuals discover or accept their true sexual orientation later in life. It’s not uncommon for people to identify as straight until a particular experience prompts them to reconsider. This realization can occur in one’s 20s, 30s, or even later, highlighting the fluidity and complexity of human sexuality.
For readers of A4A blog, this story may strike a chord. Have you ever experienced something similar—an event or relationship that made you question your sexual orientation? At what age did you come to terms with being gay or bisexual? Whether it was during your 20s or at another point in life, your story could provide valuable support to others navigating their own paths of self-discovery.
The process of understanding one’s sexuality is unique to each individual. It can be a gradual journey or something that happens suddenly, triggered by a particular event. If you’ve had a similar experience, consider sharing your story to help others who might be going through the same thing. Your perspective could be just what someone else needs to hear.
I go back and forth about am I gay or not still to this day I still question it I haven’t had any luck with finding or talking talking to women but always like talking to guys because I can be myself and guy know how to talk to me and guys like what I have as in body type and I have a good butt with women you have to talk then get to know them some of them but with guys they go straight into talking about sex I like that I have two side of me one… Read more »
Where does your heart lie? Not who do you want sex with, but who do you want to make love with? Maybe either gender, maybe one. Maybe you want all of the above combined with love. Or maybe you want a woman who can do all of the above? They do exist. But more likely you are gay, is my guess.
maybe your bi many bi people like sex with one gender only but would see themselves only sleeping and having a relationship with the other sex
much ado about nothing somedays we think this, somedays we think that it is human nature to debate about something until we come to the undeniable conclusion the straight or gay routine is trite everyone really knows deep down inside it is the nature of our society to infuse common sense with sensationalism
at the end of the day, once we boys get to a certain age, our sexual identities become irrelevant. go to the local senior centers, nursing homes or assisted livings, no one cares about where you put your face or whether you legs were sky high
I believe that I identify as being bi. I have had good encounters with men and women, and I’ve had encounters with both men and women that I wish had never occurred. I’m a very down to earth person so that’s the type of person that I am attracted to. Stuck up people and women that think they are a princess have no appeal to me. Physical attractiveness is fine as long as the person doesn’t have a god complex.
I agree i am the same as you
It don’t matter suck one cock and your branded gay and a cocksucker for life
fact is you can suck cock and love it and be BI i love to suck cock but i am still bi
any your still labeled a cocksucker
Subject: I though I was straight. I’m going to flip it and say I prayed to be straight. When I was pre-teen, I liked looking at boys. I felt it just wasn’t normal. I heard gay jokes and back then boys that acted like girls were called a sissy and made fun of. I heard my parents talking about gay people saying they were “funny”. I often heard that men laying up with men won’t make it into heaven. That’s why I prayed to be straight. I learned later in life that God makes no mistakes. I may have went… Read more »
You must be who you are. Be proud of things not based on your gender preference. Yes, gender preference defines you, but only in one way, and your life is more than your gender preference. Religious dogma is a set of rules that define what a group wants them to be. You may not be in that group. The whole concept of Pride is amalgamating diversity– which can be moral, but not defined by someone else’s dogma. I try to be a moral person, but I’m also a promiscuous queer. Oh wait, that’s not in the (good) book. Will my… Read more »
I can relate to your post and just a bit of the article about the matter. Though for me I sadly didn’t even have a chance to get a certain age in life to make my own decisions of what I wanted to be or meant to be sexually due to being m*lested multiple times by a family member when I was 4 to 5 years old before the abuses finally stopped when my mom and I moved to another home far away from my abuser. Because of the sexual traumas I’ve endured at such a young age, by the… Read more »
ALL have sinned and fallen short. You can’t control what happened in the past, but you can pray God takes these cares onto his shoulders and help you to find forgiveness for your abuser in order to release that burden on you.
I did, like most boys, until I saw a photo of my first naked man in Playboy, yes, in Playboy. Did you know Hugh Hefner was bisexual?
Yeah, I get that. I realized I was bi when I saw ads for penis enlargers in the back of Penthouse and Hustler. The guys in those ads had beautiful dicks, and I realized I had to try sucking one.
I had always known I was not like the other guys I knew. It wasn’t until I was 12 in the sixth grade did I realize What made me different. Since then, I have never doubted.
i am married for 23 hears to a woman. , but fooled around witb guys at 18-20 i assumed i was straight, but never a satisfied sexually with woman. Over last 10 plus years times cha ged and porn attracted e to gay porn. I was in vegas with wife and got to know a guy who may have has a few drinks in him.. He followed me in bathroom and grabbed my ass. I was shocked but went with flow. He had to go back to his room and asked to go with him. However, when in room, he… Read more »
Well that didn’t sounds like a made up story at all
Haha, actually my and my uncle’s story is very similar to Kevin’s and it’s not made up at all. After that first random ass grab in the men’s restroom, it progressed so quickly, I didn’t know what what was happening until it was time to put my clothes back on and meet my now ex-wife and two sons in the hotel lobby.
I’ve ALWAYS been attracted to women BOTH physically AND emotionally. As I started experimenting and having sexual fun with guys sprinkled in over the past twenty years, I learned that while having sex with guys usually has zero or very little drama to it, I don’t believe I could be in an emotionally connected, day-to-day relationship with another guy…Not saying I wouldn’t be willing to try, but I also wouldn’t want to “emotionally experiment” just to see if I could do it, I mean what would be the point? The funny thing is that the “stable of guys” whom I… Read more »
Thanks for sharing this because sexuality is so complex and confusing. We are all wired differently with our sexuality and identity, but at the same time we are technically the same. When I was younger I used to lie about not being gay, even though most people could tell I was. I briefly identified as bi, but I knew I was lying to myself. I find many women attractive and I admire their beauty and body, but I am not sexually attracted to them. I’ve had sex with a handful of them and it felt good, but I prefer to… Read more »
This guy … “OP (original poster) had always identified as straight, although he confessed that he didn’t “think I was ever properly attracted to women how a straight guy should be.” I just can’t wrap my head this guy. What media vacuum did he grow up and become an adult in? Did he never see movies, or read books, or television show that depicted men and women, males and females, Straight and Gays showing him what his options were? He must have masturbated. What was he fantasizing about? How lost was he? Thank God for him, he had connected with… Read more »
When I was about 5 years old a kid I use to hang with made me suck his dick. We were across the street in the woods and he wrapped a towel around my through and lightly choked me until I sucked him. Too young to cum but still able to orgasm that’s what he did. When he had orgasm at that point it turned me on and I liked it. I liked the fact he was pleased from what I did to make him feel good. Moving on in life never had a thought of wanting to play with… Read more »
I had no idea that I would be interested in sex with men until I was in my early 30s. I was always very sexual, but guys simply were not part of that. I really enjoyed reading erotica and especially loved to read group sex stories. But those stories were all about a guy with multiple women. One day one of these stories had a guy who sucked several dicks in it and my body reacted to it – much to my surprise. I started seeking out these stories more and more until all of the stories were about men… Read more »
Well, some interesting responses so far! I started noticing girls forming boobs at the end of elementary school and even more so in junior high. In high school I was desperate to get laid, but due to extreme low self-esteem, found it difficult to do more than talk with girls. But I had no physical attraction to guys. But as one responder here suggested, with age many of us open ourselves, stretch our awareness of ourselves and others. When I began experimenting with guy sex (OMG, age 40), it was just that – if I didn’t like it physically or… Read more »
I felt feelings of attraction to guys when I was in grade 2. Yet at 16, I had sex with a woman and enjoyed it greatly. But right after, I realized my high school male sex partners were where I belonged, as a gay male. In those years, and still true, social pressures push gay folks back into the closet. From this come feelings of guilt and shame, when there is absolutely no reason to feel these emotions. Obviously, this affects our self-esteem Greatly. When I was 30+ years old, while sitting with my dying father in hospital (two days… Read more »
I can see how that could-would be possible. It’s like having sex, outside of ones’ ethnicity; after you’ve been programmed to hate that particular ethnicity . . .
Not like that at all…
Oh, sure it is, I’ve been there and seen it “once you black, you never go back” ring a bell? Of course it does, we’ve ALL heard it, it’s about the forbidden, taboo, what’s considered evil even, etc.
Was 38 before i became very attracted to men, shortly after that i experienced my first sexual encounter with another man which was the most eeotic sexual encounter ive ever had, still attracted to females but have only had sexual encounters with men for the 5 years, i have grown to appreciate these encounters throughout the years and consider myself fully gay now
Growing up in an religious family, with 3 older straight males.. in an environment with rampant homophobia … I thought I was straight myself… then at 16 I met a cute kid in school and suddenly these feelings strange feelings came over me! Up until my junior year in high school I thought I like only girls… the things you learn about yourself… in 30s now I identify as pansexual.
I am sexual ! Thats it, thats the only “label” that accuratly describes this part of my life.
All these labels are imposed upon us, or if not imposed are dangled in front of us with with the inference that we must “belong” to some group. Of course then what happens ??? We are pitted against some other group or groups in an effort to separate us, and unfortunatly for us all, it is effective,,,,,, UNITED WE STAND !!!! DEVIDED WILL WILL SURLY FALL ………
i thought i was straight until i started watching bi and gay porn and began chatting with men, the first time i masturbated on cam for a man i knew i wanted sex with a man and finally had my first on a business trip, when i saw his hard cock i could not resist going down on him, loved it and now i cant get enough
to be perfectly honest, i am gay have always been attracted to men,it started when i was about 11yo and played around with the neighbor across the street. with that being said, i have watched both straight and gay porn, and to be Frank the women in the movies sounded fake as shit, now i have never been with a woman but can’t believe that they sound like that in real life( my opinion only) i could be wrong in that.
Man or woman? Yes! It’s about the person, I am no longer eliminating half the population, there are interesting, beautiful sexy people of both genders.
I don’t think I have seen a group of people more hung up on labels.
I’m not sure what I am. I really only find woman or mtf trans attractive to look at. But when it comes to sex, I prefer men. It’s so much more primal and intense. Even though I’m attracted to woman, my biggest fantasy is to be in a house full of muscular hairy bears fucking in every room. Just a giant orgy of men fucking everyone sucking fucking and getting fucked. Hell, my top 5 sex fantasies all include sex with partners with a cock and no one with a vagina
The last thing I would ever want to be is “straight”. Women are way too much trouble and not worth it at all. I have had great sex all my life and never had to waste a single cent on jewelry or insanely over priced hand bags. Never had to blow hundreds of dollars in “gentlemen’s” clubs to be teased by pathetic “lap dances”. For $15 (now $30 with inflation) I could plow all the ass I could handle (I regularly would fuck as many as10 guys a night) at hot fuck clubs like 442 Natoma in San Francisco or… Read more »
I have enjoyed many women (and more men) and have never thought about buying jewelry or handbags, Never been to a “Gentleman’s Club “. I don’t get hung up on preconceived judgements and I dont brag about how much sex I get.
honey baby, 1ce ya touch play jack suck da PUDD, congratulations, you just turned GAY! you can never turn it back either .. PUSSY has now become an afterthought
Mom expected me to get married and have children. Tried that and it did not work. Have two wonderful children and now grand children.
I came out in early 20’s. Had sex with 2 females. I felt extremely awkward, It was not a pleasant experience. I’ve had 4 major loves in my life (all men). The last relationship was open. We both fooled around. I met a bisexual Arab-Puerto Rican. We were FWB, for over 25 years. Met a couple more bisexual guys. Their wives knew before they got married. It wasn’t an issue for them. I enjoy bisexual men, cause there is not this huge attention put on COCK. I am a masculine, well-built male, who doesn’t exhibit any gay traits. An astute… Read more »
I was about 12 when I first realized that I had an attraction to guys as well. And I think for most of my life I would have considered myself bisexual. But I think I always knew that sexually I leaned much more gay. My emotional relationships have always been with women so I guess you would say I am what’s referred to as mixed orientation. But while I can have a very deep emotional relationship with women, sexually… nothing is as exciting, pleasurable, or fulfilling as being gay. But I have sex with men I get lost in the… Read more »