Capture d’écran 2018-10-09 à 09.29.48

Speak Out: What’s The Biggest Lie You’ve Told To Get A Date?

Over the years, the phenomena of catfishing and telling lies online has grown along with the rise of the internet and social media. It’s relatively easy to do, after all. The internet and social media is built in such a way that you can not just be anonymous, but even build an entirely new persona online.

There could be a number of reasons why people lie online. For the gay community, the main reason seems to be ageism, or at least that’s what a recent survey has discovered. Gay Star News conducted the survey, which showed that one in four gay and bisexual men lied on hookup apps and on dates.

The main reason the respondents gave for the lie is the fact that they feel dating in the gay community is “totally” ageist. Sixty percent of the respondents felt this way, as opposed to the 0.9 percent of people who felt dating in the gay community was “absolutely not” an ageist experience.

The survey involved 3,000 respondents, with 35 percent of them retired and 65 percent not. The survey was conducted for the inaugural LGBTI Founders’ Day.

Taking everything said above into account, we wanted to ask our Adam4Adam blog readers if they’ve ever had to lie just to be able to get a date. We’re not just talking about your age either. Have you ever had to lie about your looks, your height, your job? If you’ve always been truthful on your dating profiles, what’s the biggest lie that you’ve encountered? We’d love to hear all about it. Share your stories with us in the comments section below.

There are 37 comments

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  1. Kim

    I dont think it is a deliberate lie, but rather an honest mistake. It seems many people measure their dick in centimeters and report it as inches

  2. JB

    I have had people lie about their age, what they do for a living, the kind of car they drive, and even where they live. And especially their weight. I’m like if you plan on meeting at some point you do know the lies will catch up to you. SMH

  3. Ray

    The thing about lies is you’re going to get busted…and if it’s just a hookup why bother lying? If an actual date, and there’s interest in a second, then you should be a man and come clean.

    Who doesn’t meet without a face pic??

  4. anonimatovato

    Guys on apps would even lie about std status just to get laid. That’s a major no-no. Putting other people at risk just to get off. Faux tops also lol! There’s no shame in bottoming, why lie about it? Guys that say they’re masc, blah.

  5. Pan392000

    I do not lie or lie in my profile. That being said, you can guess how many date I have been on. Or even hook ups I have had. Yep, not many. Seems I am in a category where (to coin an older phrase) I am a dime a dozen. But I can at least say I don’t lie and then have to maintenance for life.

  6. MuscleMarine

    I have seen people with HIV neg as thier status on one site and the same person has HIV positive as their status on another site….That is so fucked up. I never lie to get a date

    • Ihduhno

      Is it fucked up because you have unsafe sex? How are they putting you at risk if you are always safe? I would like anyone to explain to me why their status matters. And before you make a hypocrite out of yourself, please understand if you are safe you risk nothing. I believe people are concerned about their partners status because they wish to have unsafe sex. I tried the method of only sleeping with guys that said they were neg, but the simple fact is it is very hard to be 100% sure. We all know that if when you get tested, if you were exposed too recently, the test won’t find it. And these days the suggestion is to get tested once a year. Suffice to say if you have raw sex and you think you’re neg it only a matter of time. People don’t like being discriminated against. And especially when the reason is because of ignorance. So please keep showing off your IQ by rejecting men that say they are positive, and give them all the motivation to lie so you can point your finger at them.

  7. arturo

    I lie about my occupation sometimes.

    Tell a guy you’re a doctor, you’ll turn off the sexual vibe and become a source of information about every health problem in the dates entire life, and his family LOL!

    Once, in the middle of passionate foreplay, I got a “hey, are you examining me?” as my hands lovingly made their way up and down. He was angry!!!! Immediately I thought- what do you have to hide… Never saw him again! So now it’s “I work in a hospital”.

  8. Hunter0500

    i don’t lie. What’s the point? Sooner or later it’ll bite you in the ass. Tell a lie and you’ll have to tell others to support it. Pretty quickly, smart guys will make your house of cards fall.

    Have had some guys lie to me. It’s easy to figure out if you chat for while before just jumping into a hookup. If you take time to chat for a day or few before meeting, lies become evident. Suddenly, things don’t make sense … or he begins to over explain … or back pedal .. or delay.

    If you’re looking to jump into a right now, once and done, hookup … you won’t see it. Take a breath, find guys who are willing to chat with you about who they are, and lies are not part of the equation.

  9. VarsityGuy

    I’ve lied about my age b/c the gay world really is ageist. I’ve also been lied to about his height, weight, and guys have even used fake pics. And of course they’re always lying about his dick. I’m not sure what world guys are measuring their dicks in, but I want to go there! Everyone is at least 8 inches.

    • Hunter0500

      Age is an issue for those guys who make it one. I don’t hit up guys who specify outside of my age. Have connected with many who say they’re looking for my age … sometimes it’s older, sometimes the same, sometimes younger.

  10. MuscleMarine

    I’ve seen guys on one site have thier HIV status neg and on another site have thier status as HIV pox. It’s terrible. Me I never have to lie to get laid.

  11. Marcus

    I use to post my real age on adam and as I got older I noticed that young guys prefer guys their age or younger. Sexually, I’m attracted to younger guys… So I lowered my age about 10 years. I’m 6’0 185 slim pounds with a flat stomach, 8.5 in dick and a perfect little tite firm ass. I go to the gym 6 days a week and eat right. I shave my head, neatly manscape my chest and pubic area to eliminate or minimize the gray. Im in very good shape and my friends and family alway tell me I look younger than what I am. Lowering my age on here have gotten me numerous dates. Once I get to know the guy (and had sex) I can tell them my
    real age and they could care less. I’m a professional, masculine brother with great conversational skills and very successful. My thing is I hate lying but being that some gay guys are so shallow and age bias that it’s hard to get my foot in the door otherwise…… So that is my lie to help me get dates and the young guys I date are grinning from ear to ear. 😉

  12. Symmetry17

    Honestly, many gay men automatically lie about their fitness level. Many people in general have a false idea of their fitness level. Many think just because they are not fat or look decent in clothes they are automatically “fit”. Bet if they would go to a gym they would find out just how fit they are!!

  13. Mitch

    In reading the posts it is apparent those commenting don’t lie. All are in agreement that one will have to tell the truth at some point. Remember: If you tell the truth, you will only have one story. If you lie you will have to remember who, what, when. where and when, and many can do that successfully. As others here, I do not lie. I am me, take it or leave it. For the person who wrote the article, I don’t think you’re getting what you want to hear. Those of us that do read the articles must be generally honest people and simply do not lie about ourselves.

  14. BiProud

    I see more than one comment about THE WORST lie one can commit on these sites….”Neg on PReP”. Usually, it goes like this….”Neg” or “Neg on PReP” and “Drugs No” and you wind up with a poz tweeker. It happened to me by me being dumb enough to believe this guy, and then I found his Truvada and another ARV AND an issue and a spoon in his bathroom. (It PAYS sometimes to be a tad nosy.) Now I don’t trust ANYONE unless I see a full, current STI panel AND, if I see the usual methhead affect, a drug test. Needless to say, I don’t get many hookups off of Grindr, which in my locale, is about 80% tweekers.

  15. Casper

    The biggest lie I ever told?

    I’m interested, but my wife is home and I can’t get out! A lie such as the aforementioned serves a distinct purpose: it spares reality and puts the onus on another.

    Devious, yes; pragmatic, yes. We all lie; it is our nature to ‘bend-the-truth’. It is the proper use of what lays between our ears without having to resort to exaggeration what hangs between our legs.

  16. Love to suck

    I lie about my age, but come clean after a meet up or two. But the age I am and the age I say are plausible, plus my pictures are real and span several years, and currently the most current is too years, so I need to update again.. Usually people are surprised when I tell them my age. ok I might be an inch shorter than i say, but everything else else is true.

    What i find is people who say there are versatile are usually like it seems like 99% are 100% bottoms, have pictures of their ass but can’t seem to say it. I wonder how many guys who say Bi are really Bi.

    I assume everyone has the potential of being NOT DDF so I play safer. Condoms for fucking, and no condoms means no fucking no matter how much PrReP they say they are on. My HIV status list the date of the test. And guys Hiv neg, 2016 means nothing.

  17. Lamar

    Nope, I’ve not lied about a thing, “I am what I am” not, what I have or don’t have, or where I work or where I don’t work or even, if, I work, lol; take it or leave it, and I too, have ‘that’ right. I can’t understand the fact, that some (insecure) people lie about what they do for a livin’ when mostly, its “just sex”= hook-up, anyway, what’s the damn point? Doesn’t make any sense.

  18. Rick

    Not that I’ve told. Met a black guy for a hookup. He said he was 6 inches. When he showed up, he was 11 inches an thick as a beer can. He started with a condom, then pulled out and took it off. He dived back in and came 4 times like a volcano! We’ve been playing a couple of times a week ever since (2 years.

  19. Oseas Pineda

    Hello guys.
    First I would say to say that English is not my first language, but I will do my best to have a comment about this issue.
    Almost everybody start lying about their age after 30-35. So if I see someone profile I will 5 more years.
    then I decided if I am interested or not.
    The issue I do have about is more than 5 years. I met a guy one time on his profile he said he was 35, and when show up was someone close to 60 years old.
    I just say no, probably if he was more honest wouldn’t have an issue with it
    When you meet the person you will guess their age anyway.
    A few times a have to say no, before they even came in to my place.
    And lies about other issues as well.
    I lie a little bit too, but not that much.

  20. buz

    Don’t see the point of lying. If you really plan to meet the guy it just doesn’t pay. Lying about your status is really low, your potential partner deserves to be made aware and then make the choice. I’m 70 years old and never lied about my age, just not worth it to me. When I am on line I try to be completely honest. It’s the only constant since you really don’t know about the other guy. Usually if they lie, eventually you will be able to tell because it just won’t add up at some point. Just can’t be bothered about lying unless you are talking about that floating 10 pounds (lol)

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